Today, my colleague rushed off to the hospital for the birth of his first son. Having met his wife at the Christmas party a couple of years ago, I called to congratulate her. Shame I didn't realize it was his mistress having the baby. Guess who broke the news to the wife. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my wife's mistress, at the maternity ward in the hospital, after she gave birth to our second child. FML
Today, at work, we were gathered to be told some bad news. One of our colleagues would be taking indefinite leave because his wife had dropped their newborn baby. I accidentally laughed at the image. FML
Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has been having an affair with another woman. He works with me and the woman also works in the same company. She is also married and is now 6 months pregnant. They are throwing a baby shower for her on Monday. FML
Today, I got a call from my local hospital's emergency room, stating my wife was in labour. My wife and I split years ago, but just haven't divorced. She's been telling everyone I'm the baby's father. My current girlfriend is 7 months pregnant with my child. FML
Today, at the hospital I work at, I had to deliver my best friend's baby. I later found out that my ex boyfriend was the father. Normally this wouldn't faze me, but it did because we broke up last month. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. She hadn't even called me; I saw the news on my Facebook news feed. FML
Today, I gave birth to a baby girl. Where was my husband after the agony finally ended? Standing just outside the room, flirting with a nurse. FML
Today, my best friend called me and told me she was in the hospital in labor. Excited, I rush to the hospital. Once I arrived, I saw my boyfriend of 4 years in the room. I asked him what he was doing there and my friend says, “You wanna tell her or should I?” Turns out he’s leaving me for her. The baby is his. FML
Today, my wife had our first child. He's identical to her coworker. FML
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Top comments
fmlcomment 2
...if he wanted it kept secret, why was he telling everyone at his work?
dracer 0
Ooops, but at least you got the wife into the clearing! It's about time she saw through the cheating bastard this colleague of yours is!
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Comments (95)
ArielTheMermaid 17
did it not occur to everyone calling 'fake' that OP could have been expecting to leave a voicemail?
ZXDriver 0
Wait.. If she's in the hospital having a kid.. What the hell are you doing calling her right now?
newburton13 26
It was the colleague's mistress having the kid, not his wife.
alialley 10
I think #112 was simply asking, if you think she's in the hospital going through contractions, why call her?
newburton13 26
You did the right thing, man.
InvisibleMonster_fml 16
Probably OP called afterwards.
alialley 10
Why is this *your* FML?
PurpleDrankkx 7
Ooooohhh my god. That really sucks.
bazookajoey 27
Was sooo not your fault OP.
The_Mad_Writer 3
Ouch.... that'd be the worse ever
doglover100 29
She was going to find out eventually.
NamelessFace 22
Not your fault. Besides, you know no one else was gonna tell her.