Today, I went to get my first tattoo. Before we started, the tattooist told me to just relax and embrace the pain. I guess I did that too well; I kept getting an erection throughout. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. Fifty minutes into the tattoo on my back, the artist said, "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML
Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML
Today, I was having sex for the first time with a girl who wanted to be friends with benefits. Halfway through sex she noticed that I had the same tattoo as her brother, and had a full-on panic attack that lasted half-an-hour. FML
Today, I woke up and felt that my arm was sore. I got so drunk last night, I got an unprofessional tattoo of a penis. FML
Today, I was instructed to shave my back in preperation for my first tattoo. I'm a girl. FML
Today, I had to re-take an hour long MRI scan because I got an erection midway through. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off, only to learn that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML
Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a "talk." So now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML
Today, my quite squeamish girlfriend came with me to get my latest tattoo. She saw a few drops of blood, screamed in the tattooist's ear, and completely fucked up part of the outline. She had to alter the tattoo drastically to cover up the mess and now it just looks bad. FML
Today, I went to get a tattoo of my girlfriend's name to surprise her. Halfway through the tattooing, she called and broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
anonymous_kenie 7
Hey sometimes life is hard
bloodierframe30 16
Wow. I'll call that a 'Hard' time
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Comments (131)
trellz17 19
Weird, getting tattoos do that to me too.
MissMalicious 3
I guess your "Think happy thoughts" idea didn't go exactly as planned.
dachayke 16
So that's what tinkerbell's pixie dust does to you? Damn!
finch01 18
was it a girl that gave you the tattoo?
bakingqueen 7
Christian Grey is that you!
perdix 31
Getting pricked gives you a boner? You might find a hole new set of "friends."
dachayke 16
I can't decide if that was a horrible pun or a grammar mistake.
perdix 31
#31, go with horrible pun. ;)
schadenfreud 6
invest in a bed of nails, you'll never need a significant other
PatandIsabella 4
Mmmmmmm, that's hot
underthesea12 24
you kinkster!
WhackTheJackal 22
That must of been "HARD" on your skin.
dachayke 16
No, not the caps lock!
worldclassrager 41
Sure hope there was a hot chick you could blame it on...that's a bit awkward...