Today, I was in a cinema watching a movie to review in the local paper. Suddenly, the guy behind me leans in and starts whispering and hissing, "Do it... Do... It. DO IT" for the rest of the movie. I'm still not sure what he wanted me to do, but he did smell of vomit and had a tea-cosy on his head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the movies with my friends. All throughout, some guy kept making weird sounds and breathing deeply. Midway through the movie, he got even louder. Just as I was about to snap, chunks of vomit sprayed over my chair and shoulders. FML
Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML
Today, I was having a rough day, so I decided to go to the movies to unwind. 15 minutes in, some assmunch behind me said "This movie sucks!" then dumped his drink over my head and ran out. FML
Today, I went to the movies on a date. My chair made a fart sound while I moved around a little, so my date thought I'd let one rip. He then let out a really horrendously smelling one to make me feel less embarrassed, giving me a reassuring look. FML
Today, at the cinema, I sat next to a guy who couldn’t stand a minute without laughing or making comments about the film. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend to a scary movie, hoping I could comfort her at a scary part. Instead when a scary part came on, she reacted by throwing up all over my lap and the person in front of us. FML
Today, I was sitting in a theater waiting for the movie to start when a hot guy sat next to me. Trying to impress him, I made seemingly witty comments to my friend throughout the movie. When it ended, he loudly complained to his friends about the 'annoying girl' sitting next to him. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. He went to get popcorn and I went to the bathroom. Thinking he had got back before me, I sat down next to him in the theater. I leaned in to kiss him, then realized it was some 70-year-oldish woman. FML
Today, I was working at the theater as an usher. A man came up to me and gave me his ticket. At the same time, he took a sip of water and suddenly felt the need to sneeze. The water came out from his nose and landed all over my face. I was covered with his mucus and had to wish him a good movie. FML
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Top comments
StopDropNRoll 11
What in the world is a tea-cosy?
SadinSherman 16
RIP Dobby
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Comments (92)
tacos_are_good 8
did you ask him what he wanted you to do?
nickiforever21 0
She could've just moved...
himynameischeese 6
kids day the earnest things... and I guess people watching movies do to!?
YayFlameWarz 9
I'm sorry, but shut up.
himynameischeese 6
thank you are nice
MsJoyfull 4
Love is in the air, everytime you look around.
LizzJizz 16
Either he wanted u to write a shit review...or it was his way of asking you to do it with him;) hardcore cinema fornication
ShyAnn29 15
His own way of asking for sex, maybe....
funky303 6
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tea_cosy
onthetoilet 3
Mountain dew? Scooby Doo?
perdix 31
You should have whipped it out and started masturbating, y'know, WWPWHD?
undeadqueen528 0
What dose that abbreviation mean?
anothersuicide 0
it means WhoseWhitePenisWouldHeDo
shelbyyyy11 0
why didn't you move?
pip74205 9
Why didn't you move to another seat?
ILoveEmoes 9
Communication, communication, communication! What the heck did he want you to do?! Now we'll never know, thanks a lot OP.