Today, I went with my girlfriend to her parents' house. They told me I smelled of cheap vodka. When I told them I worked in a bio lab and used ethanol a lot, they said I was too stupid to do anything like that. My girlfriend broke up with me because her parents think I'm a drunk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my girlfriend's mom. She went on about how my girlfriend's dad is a no good drunk, following this statement with spilling her fifth glass of wine. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over, drank half a bottle of Jack Daniels and pissed in my sink. I broke up with her and went out with friends. I met a woman and brought her home to watch a movie. She drank a bottle of wine and puked on my couch. FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his family. They were drinking and having fun, so I joined in. I had one too many, got really goofy, and then suggested the farting game. "Sorry, I can't hold my liquor!" I quickly explained. My boyfriend's mom shot me a cold look and said, "It's non-alcoholic." FML
Today, I found out the reason my boyfriend dumped me was because his parents don't like the fact that I go to a prestigious university. However, they're completely accepting of the drunken slob who's dating their daughter. FML
Today, my parents lectured me about how my girlfriend will ruin my life, because she's a single mom, a recovering alcoholic, and has chronic health issues. Apparently, I should be with their friend's rude, trashy daughter, who can't keep a job, and goes on a drunken, drug-fueled bender every other week. I'm 31. FML
Today, it's been 2 weeks since I took my girlfriend to meet my friends, and they made her play a drinking game. A question she had to answer was about me and how she liked my hygiene, because her ex had terrible hygiene and never wiped his ass. Today she dumped me for him, so now to my friends I'm the guy who is lower than the skidmarks guy. FML
Today, at dinner, I accidentally let it slip that I'd taken a small sip of alcohol a few years ago and hated it. My extremely strict parents are now trying to get me into rehab. FML
Today, my girlfriend's overprotective parents decided that I'm a bad influence on their daughter. I'm a straight A engineering student who openly speaks out against drugs, alcohol, and discrimination. Their reason? Someone told them I dyed my hair black. They think I'm a "closet Nazi". FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her father looked me up and down, said, “No” then went back to his TV. My girlfriend immediately broke up with me and threw me out. I even had to get a really expensive taxi home, because we’d driven in her car and I had no idea what part of the city I was in. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
airbornerose 0
Wow. Sounds like the girlfriend is the idiot.
null_fml 11
I think there's more to this story than a 300-character-limit allows. (or whatever number it actually is)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (90)
dandymidori 0
Maybe it's just an excuse for your girlfriend to dump you D: don't worry about it (:
weeeeeener 0
wow what ASSHOLES
JokerXero 0
Umm Vodka doesnt have a smell, pure Alcohol is odorless, tasteless, and smell less. SO FYL for dealing with stupid people
drstrangelove64 0
vodka is very rarely pure alcohol.
boone_fml 0
vodka reeks. drink more.
bbbbbbb89 0
100% ethanol actually has a very strong smell.. did you hear that from a friend of a freind and actually have no idea what your talking about? oh and vodka is obviously not "pure" alcohol.. its diluted yes? thats why you can drink it... obviously.
bbbbbbb89 0
oh and odourless and "smell less" are the same thing....
leisl14 0
as your body breaks it down it does give off a smell.. like it's coming out of your pores. i can always tell when a person has been drinking a lot of vodka
Joe2794 0
Kind of random but when I rated this an FYL there were 6666 people that rated it >_>
Rosalind_fml 0
You don't want her anyway. Obviously something's wrong with people in her family.
Neferria 0
Hey, better for you. You don't have to put up with your stupid girlfriend or her ignorant family anymore.
SMDBEEZY 0
SUCK MY DONKEY DICK ALL YOU STANKY HOES
aww_yeeeuh 0
this is a fmylife in itself.
thelonelylurker 0
Good for you, OP, good for you.
athos1237 4
Dude that's what a shower and cologne are for so you don't smell like work before meeting the parents.
theta_fml 0
Her parents are idiots, she's probably not worth it.