Today, my brand-obsessed sister bought $200 shorts. She was cutting the tag off of them in the kitchen and left them on the counter. I went into the kitchen, poured me some coke, and spilled it all over the counter. I thought the shorts were a rag. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while working in my shop, I was mopping the floor. A customer saw what I was doing, grabbed a bottle of Coca-Cola from the shelf, and poured it all over the floor where I had just finished mopping. FML
Today, I found out where my $300 worth of American Eagle and Hollister clothes had disappeared to. My 16 year old sister shredded them with scissors, took pictures of it for her Myspace and said that I deserved it for being a "conformist." All her "internet friends" said it was awesome. FML
Today, I grabbed a pair of pants from the dryer in a hurry, trying to make it to the bank. When I rushed in, I felt something fall down my leg. It was a pair of my mom's granny panties that had been stuck inside my jeans. I kicked them aside, hoping no one would notice. They did. FML
Today, I was in a rush to get my lunch for work. I quickly opened my fridge to grab it, and accidentally knocked over a beer, spilling a little on my pants. I told myself I'd spray them in the car. I forgot, and when I got into work, someone sat down and commented that they smelled beer. The person was a student. FML
Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
Today, I was craving a cold Coke, so I grabbed one from the freezer where I had put it to chill quickly. As soon as I opened it, the can exploded all over me and the kitchen. I spent the next hour cleaning sticky residue off the floor, surrounding furniture, and even the ceiling. FML
Today, I finished off the last of the BBQ chips in the house. When my 6-year-old sister found out about it, she started screaming, then pulled down her pants and peed on the kitchen floor. My parents, after witnessing the whole thing, bitched me out for upsetting her. FML
Today, I wore a pair of shorts a size too big while doing laundry. When I ordered a pizza afterwards and answered the door, I realized I looked a little heavy, so I sucked in my stomach. My shorts fell to the ground in front of the delivery guy. FML
Today, my sister and I had a fight. In her rage, she threw piles of dirty laundry at me. One of her bloody panties hit me on the face. FML
Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Cheapskate! If she spent $500, she could have bought shorts that resembled a puddle of cat vomit. I don't understand fashion.
xxlk4xx 6
should be fine if you wash them right away!
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Comments (6)
xxlk4xx 6
should be fine if you wash them right away!
RichardPencil 32
Cheapskate! If she spent $500, she could have bought shorts that resembled a puddle of cat vomit. I don't understand fashion.
tounces7 28
As dumb as fashion trends are these days that might have made them worth more.
Sady_Ct 38
She left them on a kitchen counter, something was bound to be spilt on them.
Grizz8831 14
while you should have double checked... that is a very bad spot for clothing to sit unattended. FTL but would suck to hear about afterwords for you...
jfigley 5
So does she buy these over-priced clothes with her own money or does mommy and daddy pay for them???