Today, I got a talking-to at work from my new manager for eating other peoples' lunches. Immediately afterwards, I watched my manager leave the room, take MY lunch, and begin eating it. Apparently my new manager is the thief, and I'm now the office pariah who gets the blame. Nobody believes me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML
Today, I finally caught the person who has now and again been stealing my lunch at work for weeks. It was my boss. I awkwardly watched him eat my sandwich while he talked about how he's been "saving money by bringing food from home." FML
Today, for what has seemed to be the hundredth time, my labeled bagged lunch was stolen from the fridge at my workplace. I stormed into my boss's office ready to complain, only to find him eating it. FML
Today, I have been victimised by a lunch thief at work for months, despite numerous complaints to management, so I exposed the thief by lacing my curry with that old classic, laxatives. Even though my coworker was caught brown-handed shitting himself, I was the one suspended for making him sick. FML
Today, I was been accused of stealing lunches from the fridge at work. I’m a huge germaphobe and would NEVER eat someone else’s food, but because I’m the fattest one in the office, everyone automatically blamed me. Hashtag fatgirlproblems. FML
Today, I overheard my coworkers talking about how someone has been stealing lunches from the office fridge. Feeling guilty, I admitted that I took a sandwich yesterday, thinking it was free. Turns out, they were joking to see who’d confess. FML
Today, there's a food thief in our office who manages to steal from the fridge without being caught, and everyone keeps blaming me, probably because I’m the fattest. I have a gastric band and can only eat a few mouthfuls before being full, but still people think I’m stealing entire bags of food. FML
Today, my slacker co-worker accused me of stealing because I got more hours than him. I was called into the manager's office and interrogated. They believed him, and sent me home for the day. I guess it pays off being the boss's kid. FML
Today, someone had been stealing my brownie at work every day, so I sprinkled cocolax on one and waited to find out who the culprit was. Turns out it was my manager. Needless to say, I'm fired. FML
Today, after weeks of stealing lunch from one of my employees, he made a sandwich with canned cat food, soap, and something unimaginably spicy that caused me to spew all over my office and laptop. I fired him. Now everyone is treating me like a monster. FML
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Top comments
Leeono 26
Crush some laxatives in YOUR food and leave a note not to eat it. It's not your fault if someone spends the day on the loo as you did warn them.....
GhostFox 34
Don't use any sort of laxative in your food- it can get you charged with poisoning someone. You can however put something that is spicy, but not spicy enough to cause medical issues on your "food" and bring a spare lunch to actually eat. Alternatively, set up a camera in the fridge area and get him on film, and use a dummy email account to forward it to everyone at work. Make sure to include yourself.
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Comments (22)
Leeono 26
Crush some laxatives in YOUR food and leave a note not to eat it. It's not your fault if someone spends the day on the loo as you did warn them.....
Steve115s 7
That is an awesome idea
GhostFox 34
Don't use any sort of laxative in your food- it can get you charged with poisoning someone. You can however put something that is spicy, but not spicy enough to cause medical issues on your "food" and bring a spare lunch to actually eat. Alternatively, set up a camera in the fridge area and get him on film, and use a dummy email account to forward it to everyone at work. Make sure to include yourself.
Mike3258 18
ok the spicy part, you can,say you enjoy spicy food. it's not your fault he ate your lunch. therefore, if he has a problem with YOUR food...
EnvyMe33 26
Putting laxative in your own food wouldn't be considered poisoning. He could be putting it in his food just to help him go if he's backed up. It wouldn't be his fault if someone stole his food and got the ***** the process.
bartsj1988 7
How can you be charged with poisioning someone if you put it in your own food. You aren't liable for the well being of thefts.
GhostFox 34
I said not to use laxatives because there was a case like this where someone used the laxative idea, the lunch thief sued them for it, and the thief won. Meaning there is a precedent set.
mekiswrite 21
Start leaving the office at lunch and make sure people see you leave
Glowworm56 27
Put a mousetrap in your lunchbox!
RichardPencil 32
There’s really only one course of action left for you: start eating everyone else’s lunch. You’re doing the time, you might as well do the crime.
Whispra 5
Time to break out the cell phone camera
Zachary8261 28
Do you have an HR Department? Bring it up with them if so.
cliff333 5
This is the stuff that creates violence in the workplace. Report your manager immediately.
Lobby_Bee 18
Simple solution, get one of those lockable lunch boxes.
fde2blknimout 18
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
He took you lunch so you will know how it feels. Learn your lesson thief
MidnaLink 35
I hope you're joking.
Norja 33
Can you read? I'm not sure that you can.