anonymous
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
Richardson, United States
Mix up
Today, I learned it's a bad idea to text and smoke while drunk, because there is an increased risk of throwing your phone off the balcony and sticking your cigarette into your pocket. FML
Top comments
theneatoburrito 8
At least you weren't drunk enough to try and jump after your phone. Sorry OP, you totally had this one coming.
kakarot2 11
Unless it was a nokia... Then we have a dead body and a new pathway to china.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (142)
HowAreYouToday 34
... I can't think of a way you didn't deserve that.
wastedpenguin 14
The local bum at the bottom of the balcony it hit,got a new phone
Cian_1 28
Albeit, a rather broken phone. :P
kakarot2 11
Unless it was a nokia... Then we have a dead body and a new pathway to china.
DaniPandi 22
46-And a not broken phone.
ElementaryEdGuy 18
I broke my Nokia phone back in the day.
zango1 15
57 - Dr Banner, is that you?
Wiringify 22
Hey #1, people are allowed to party sometimes.
AssTard 15
1- Exactly! I honestly feel that if you do something stupid like that, you shouldn't be able to post on here for sympathy.
PoisonedLiquor 17
57- you ought to stop lying! "Breaking" a Nokia is impossible.
False_Stupidity 42
I've had a Nokia break... (Being run over by a truck tends to do that)
HowAreYouToday 34
what happened to all the likes my comment had?!
alexsam_fml 10
111, you have to stop thinking its impossible. I have seen a broken Nokia in Chuck Norris museum :P
yresim 12
102 - You should totally be able to post on here. That way, everyone else can get a good laugh (and feel better about their own lives because they aren't as stupid). ;)
hig999 19
Bloody genius.
HowAreYouToday 34
He's only bloody if he decided to follow the phone.
Lioness8197 18
More like burnt...
TheNewGuy03 29
"Oh shit, oh shitshitshit. Come ba--" *splat*
HowAreYouToday 34
"Well Watson, the only thing I can't figure out is why there is a phone lodged in his skull." "Maybe its a clue that humans are stupid as f***." "Indeed."
fishstick557 14
Haha sorry OP but that's pretty funny
Quasar55_fml 18
I find it funny too but I'm not sorry at all :D
Misswildsides 22
Although it was a good laugh for me, OP, you've received no sympathy from me. You had it coming.
swash984 22
YDI OP, and it was funny.
theneatoburrito 8
At least you weren't drunk enough to try and jump after your phone. Sorry OP, you totally had this one coming.
crazytwinsmom 25
The fml was a funny visual already and you just made it more so. Thx for that. Someone should illustrate this one.
onlychildFTW 34
It's a good thing he was so drunk to think he threw the cigarette over. OP, you 1000% deserve this. You LITTER BUG forest fire starter.
X_Codes 11
@69 - Cigarettes are generally really bad at catching things on fire, but it is still disgusting to see cigarette butts lining the sidewalks. It's called a trash can, OP.
crazytwinsmom 25
I've seen road side brush fires started by someone throwing a cig butt out their car window. It must have been extremely dry brush but still.
outoftown 27
It's OP's pocket that's the trash can. Gives Hot Pockets a whole new meaning.
Beelz19 6
#75 I know one thing cigarettes are fairly good at catching on fire, trashcans.
TrilliousDivine 9
So Did you find ur phone?
dirton89 7
Even if they did, unless it had some indestructible phone case, it's a done deal.
TurquoiseJesus 15
Unless he has a Nokia. Then it'd be fine.
Codezlol 21
Could be nice thick grass and he could have been on the second floor for all we know.
ManInTheMachine 20
17-If it was a Nokia then there would be a crater where it landed. Or a dead body, if someone was walking by.
Feared 9
67- my Nokia vibrated in my pocket once. It broke both my legs.
Penguin388 5
Does anyone else get the feeling that Nokia may have been created by Chuck Norris?
Pleonasm 36
Don't get shit-faced if you can't handle the consequences of your stupidity.
zandalee 20
If we listened to this advice, no one would ever drink and the world would not be a very merry place.
Pleonasm 36
You have to drink to be merry? I've been missing out all these years.
strawberrywine22 30
I've found that, though I do drink occasionally, the best fun is had when the bartender keeps my Shirley Temples coming and my friends are too drunk to realize that I am sober and armed...with a camera :D
shorty6823 28
Geez, I'm afraid to text while sober near a balcony.
gracehi 33
Perhaps you did yourself a favor. Drinking and texting can have fatal social results. With any luck, you threw your car keys over that balcony too.
HowieDoIt 21
That's where the kid hid the keys!
kimee21_fml 15
You should quit smoking anyways :) it's like throwing money out of the windows.. Or the balcony.
j_cat187 20
And it lands in the brush; catches fire. By the time you realize your house is on fire, you're to drunk and late to act.
ImAFaker 29
And you don't have a phone...
erockinthesuburb 17
Oh GTFO of here, and take the soapbox you climbed up on with you. Nobody wants to read your "you shouldn't be smoking anyway" bullcrap. People make their own decisions, and if they want to quit, they will. If they don't, they wont. Meanwhile it's none of your concern.
outoftown 27
The only brush catching fire here would be OP's, since the lit cig went in his pocket. OP didn't specify how dry his brush was.
andyyroxx 20
87- Can I call it concern when my best friend died from cancer due to seconhand?
erockinthesuburb 17
I am sorry about the demise of your friend, but that has nothing to do with preaching to people on what they should and shouldn't do with their lives. Was OP in a closed room blowing smoke into peoples faces? No. They were outside on a balcony, which is a perfectly acceptable place to smoke where it would not harm anyone except themselves. If OP wants to quit, they will. But no amount of anti-smoking propaganda or peoples bitching is going to influence them to do so. Trust me, they already know it's bad for their health. They're still going to smoke anyway.
HowieDoIt 21
Whatever opinion you have, a little tact is generally more appreciated than lashing out at a harmless comment
kimee21_fml 15
#87 Well well, I am sorry if I offended you, but I just spoke my opinion, my dear. My dad is really sick because he used to smoke too much, and I always thought it was a waste of money, so that's it. Have a lovely day :)
The_F3rris 11
It killed my gramps.
usagiii 7
Must've been a great night. Up until the incident.