Today, I flew to see the guy that I've been in love with for three years. We spent the day at Walmart. To buy a plunger. After I blocked up the toilet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked into the ladies restroom and was shocked to see the guy I've had a huge crush on for two years. Peeing. In the sink. FML
Today, I went to the store to get Valentine's Day gifts to decorate my boyfriend's and my new apartment. He was there shopping with his wife. FML
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Today, I went with my boyfriend to meet his parents. I had to excuse myself to use the bathroom, and I ended up taking a huge crap that wouldn't flush. I had to reach in and break it up with my hands just so it would flush. Only after I washed up did I notice a plunger sitting under the sink. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me over, all just to unclog his toilet. It was clogged because he put my phone in it while he was taking a dump to see if it would actually flush. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a fight about a clogged toilet. He was yelling about not having enough money to buy a better plunger and so I stormed out to buy one myself. While pulling his truck into traffic, a car hit me causing $1000 in damage. FML
Today, I got to spend the entire day shopping for lingerie with the man of my dreams. He bought everything I'd ever wanted and more! Too bad it was for another woman. FML
Today, my boyfriend of 3 years drunkenly proposed to me, while sitting on the crapper, with the door open. FML
Today, a guy drunkenly professed his love for me. He did this after walking in on me peeing, which he decided was the time to tell me such a thing. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend came to visit. We went to a cafe where I managed to lock myself in the toilet, breaking the key. I then had to wait for them to break down the door. I came out to applause from everyone, who had been laughing at me for 25 minutes. FML
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Top comments
jamila123 5
eww. Rule number one, never take a shit in a guys house your just starting to date.
allmidnighteyes 11
I thought rule number one was to always have Plan B pills and a coat hanger ready... Or have I been going about life the wrong way?
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Comments (88)
The_Pleb 0
Pics or it didnt happen
alove23 0
So you spent ALL DAY at Walmart? wow, seriously man FYL!
irregularhunterz 0
http://ihatejade.com/?id=6eu2pqru5cqkw7ezrea67z1iym29nu
paivarotti 0
it took you a day to buy this plunger? how ******* big is this walmart?
Slackness 10
that was a quality post OP, I would just kill to hear his wedding speech to you.
LikeOhMahGoose 0
Oh god stop with the bad shit puns. But yeah that sucks why would you take a shit in his bathroom..I never do that i always do it in my own bathroom so I don't stink up other peoples bathrooms .-.
Chunchunchun 3
Damn that's unfortunate. Blocking our girlfriends' toilets is a shared fear amongst my friends and me.
PkSk8ter 0
Lmfao! Nice job
Grangoire 0
It takes you the whole day to buy a plunger?
jonny2x4 0
They got sidetracked by all the craptastic goodies within. By the way, all these goodies are made in China by little kids in sweatshops who make pennies/day and work around 20hrs/day. Ever consider that? BTW YDI for being a toilet bowl filler. You must be a total carnivore to be dropping massive lincoln logs, in your boyfriend's toilet no less. Classy!