Today, I went on a roadtrip with my boyfriend and his best friend. What I thought was going to be a great, fun time ended up with me alone in a car with two large men who wouldn't stop farting for 14 hours. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I farted myself awake, in a car full of my boyfriend's family. FML
Today, I threw up while on a road trip. My boyfriend asked what made me sick, but I didn't want to tell him that his belching the entire time smelled so goddamn bad it made me physically sick. FML
Today, I started my week-long girlscation with two of my childhood friends. So far, one hasn't stopped burping, farting, or talking about "needing dick", and the other can't stop trying to one up everyone else in the car. Day one out of five. Sigh. FML
Today, I finally felt comfortable enough to fart in front of my boyfriend for the first time. He went quiet, got up and left in his car. I haven't heard from him in 4 hours. FML
Today, I was on a road trip with my boyfriend when he pulled off at Buc-ee's, saying we needed gas. I eyed the gas gauge and it was at half tank. When I got angry, he said, "I'm driving, and we're stopping at Buc-ee's because I've never been." I fumed in the car while he farted around inside for thirty minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to re-enact a scene from Family Guy. He locked me in the car with him and farted deadly ones repeatedly. He wouldn't let me out until I learned to "love the gas." FML
Today, I was on a road-trip with some of my buddies, when we stopped at a gas station. When I opened the door to their bathroom, brown water flowed out, soaking my legs up to my knees. I then spent another 2 hours in an enclosed vehicle. FML
Today, I farted while I was in the car with my driving instructor and my partner. They couldn't hear it, but it smelled so bad that my instructor thought there was a gas leak, and he made us switch cars. FML
Today, I had to sit in a three-seat truck between my dad and his best friend on a 4-hour trip to Detroit. It was great, besides their incessant crude jokes and stories, including chafing ball sacks, and naming their new radio station, "Chicks With Dicks Radio." FML
Today, I went on a date, and everything was going fine - until the ride home. On the way, I starting having progressively bad stomach pains. Once she left the car, I passed the worst gas that I had ever encountered. As I began to leave, she knocked on the window. She forgot her purse in the car. FML
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Top comments
flufee2 27
At least the car won't need gas now!
lewaraly 8
Did you expect something different..?
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Comments (49)
joe3_fml 15
It could've been much, much worse.
Noah197099 17
At least you made it out alive. :)
vikky538 29
fabrez... your best friend on a road trip in a car...
meli1195 31
that's a very interesting way of spelling febreze... I like it
RageWolf16 31
That's nasty. Sorry, OP :/
Kitty_Kat44 31
I hope the windows were down at least.
mete_orito 34
If the weather was cold like it has been this week, I doubt it.
xninix_fml 36
@18 I'd rather be cold than have to smell that.
False_Stupidity 42
Windows down, headphones and music so you don't have to hear anything and for the love of all that is good don't stop a Taco Bell.
yerawizardlizzy 27
Or White Castle
larrena2377 26
@22, I agree with you. white castle burgers make your farts noxious times 2!
LoverWordsFood 27
I really really feel your pain OP. When my husband, his father and brothers are in the same room having farting contests... it can become really deadly, even when the contest 'ends'. You just cannot escape...
mete_orito 34
Your priority should have been to avoid any kind of beans, frijoles, or any similar food on the way.
dakotaabriannee 14
That sounds pretty shitty butt come on that's kinda a given! You should've expected that!
neuronerd 29
How were you alone in a car when there were 2 men in it?