Today, I was volunteering at a zoo event for special needs kids. My job was to dress up in a kangaroo costume and greet the kids. One kid came up and said, "You're not real!" and kicked me in the nuts. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML
Today, I was working the register at a local grocery store. A kid about 5 years old was having trouble zipping his jacket. I reached out to help him and he started screaming "No bad touch bad touch!" and kicked me in the knee. Everyone looked. FML
Today, I was punched in the balls by a monkey. FML
Today, I volunteered to sit in stocks at a fair. Lots of kids pulled off my shoes and socks and tickled my feet for several minutes. I was laughing so hard there were tears. FML
Today, I arrived to apply for my much-needed dream job. Without warning, just as the elevator opened, a complete stranger kicked me square in the nads. FML
Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML
Today, while explaining to a group of kids that monkeys are very intelligent creatures, one of them flung poo in my face. FML
Today, I volunteered to help out at an elementary school. I accidentally elbowed a little girl in the face while playing tag. And an hour later, a little boy flew out of his swing because I accidentally pushed him too hard. They're both siblings and are my child psychology instructor's kids. FML
Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML
Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML
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Top comments
anonymousjason 0
You're a woman and you have balls. Your L is F'd.
joecoyote 0
well at least he knows you weren't real lol thats a smart "slow" kid =P
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Comments (150)
cinderelly 0
aww that's sad :( i hope it doesn't stop you from volunteering again, that was really nice of you. :D
californicated 0
awhh sad. fyl.
IAmBridgette 0
Well, it gives the fake Santas something to laugh at.
rp3k99 0
At least teach the kid a lesson. Punch him or kick him in the face. Don't screw with a kangaroo, they are vicious over sized vermin and hit hard.
mijzelffan 0
you should have yelled at him telling him you are real xD
AntiChrist7 0
if you had a little dignity this would all be avoided. YDI
elfuzzo 0
The kid should be locked up. He's clearly too violent to function in normal human society. FYL.
master565 0
The only thing to do now is to say "your not either" and then Punt him 20 feet
Psodium 0
Wait till he tries it with the real kangaroo.
smooth11981 0
Man that sucks...