Today, my husband called me a nympho after I told him I'd ideally like us to have sex more than once a month. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend called me a freak for wanting to have sex for a second night in a row. FML
Today, my husband asked if we could have more sex, because we spend every day together, but if he wanted celibacy, he’d have stayed single and spent time with his friends. He then pulled out a diary proving we’ve only had sex twice this year. I was completely unaware it was so infrequent. Whoops. FML
Today, my husband complained about my lack of sex drive. Gee, I wonder why, Mr. "Always comes first by humping for a whopping 30 seconds." FML
Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML
Today, a "friend" mentioned that my husband was "yummy", then asked if she could "have a turn" with him. I left and went home, outraged. When I told my husband, he couldn't conceal his stupid horny grin, and immediately tried to initiate sex. Pig. FML
Today, I told my husband I was horny and wanted to get it on. He agreed but first he had to finish the chapter he was reading, watch his show on Netflix, argue with strangers on Facebook, then do his workout. He had the nerve to cop an attitude when I was no longer in the mood. FML
Today, as I was about to have sex with my husband, I said I wanted to "spice things up." Apparently, our ideas weren't the same. He yanked my nipples as hard as he could and said, "Yeah, you like that?" FML
Today, like every other day for the past two weeks, my husband was not in the mood for sex. He told me this while masturbating. FML
Today, I complained to my girlfriends that my husband constantly wants me to explore his disgusting perversions, like making me call him "Daddy" or putting me on a leash. They all started discussing all the nasty things they'd let my husband do, then said he should find a sidepiece who's "less boring." FML
Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML
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Top comments
fakedsincerity 32
Some people just have incompatible sex drives. He's wrong to call you names for expressing what you need to be happy. I hope you guys can talk it out and compromise so you're both happy and can have your needs met.
magikarpsmurfs 19
I think it's time to discuss with your husband that people not just yourself have needs. Those needs are normal & should be taken care of by those committed to you. AKA your husband.
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Comments (144)
igg125 30
Give him a ********, maybe he'll change his mind.
y0ima0wn 10
This is my fear
vikky538 29
If he is not in mood. Get him into the mood
lil_juggalette 15
go get a vibrating friend ;)
ajs1987 15
Once a month? My ex fiancee would think that your husband is sex-crazed.
MissRaindrop 20
The average healthy couple has sex 2-4 times a week. 4 times a week can also reduce his risk of prostate cancer by 80%. If he still refuses I would suggest a marriage counselor to work out the issues in communication and a sex therapist. You can have all the love and trust in the workd but sex is still a big part of the package. If neither of you wanted it then it would be fine. But one wanting it when the other doesn't leads to frustration and feelings of inadequacy which could potentially destroy your marriage.
Drosophila82 18
No man can live that long without sex.
emmama19 15
This relationship needs compromise in the love department. Sex is such an intimate connection with your partner not some **** act. Everyone has different drives but that's very little!!
gemstone586 12
maybe he's getting it somewhere else.
Validose 5
@ #114 - that's not true.... I've gone 3 years without any sex due to work, gym, sleep in that order.