Today, a group of Girl Scouts came to my door selling chocolate bars. I bought two bars and smiled as they left, thinking I'd done a good deed. When the door closed, I heard one of the girls say, "Told you, the fat bitches always wanna buy from us." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at work, about to go to lunch. There were some girl scouts out front selling cookies. I told my manager that I would be using a different exit, and when he asked why, I told him that girl scouts really annoy the crap out of me. The girl scouts out front were his daughters. FML
Today, a girl-scout asked me to buy cookies, in front of Giant. She looked nice, so I bought 5 boxes from her. She took the money and went home with her mom. I opened the boxes when I got home and realized that the boxes just had rocks in them. I got scammed by a girl-scout. FML
Today, I went with my friend door-to-door selling chocolates. We went to the first house, and the guy decided to buy a chocolate from each of us. He didn't have change and neither did we, so he just took the chocolates and slammed the door in our face. FML
Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML
Today, as I walked out of the local store, I noticed a young girl was sitting on the curb, crying. I nudged her with the Snickers bar I had bought earlier, thinking she needed it more than me. After looking at it, she yelled, "PEDOPHILE!", punched me in the balls, and then ran away screaming. FML
Today, my mom complained that I never do anything nice for her, so while out shopping I bought her favorite chocolate bar. When I got home, she screamed at me because she’s on a diet. FML
Today, I was walking through Borders with my girlfriend, when we pass a girl scout cookies stand. I see a box of Samoas, my favorite, point at them, and shout, 'YEAH'. My girlfriend looks shocked. Behind the box of cookies was a five year old scout bending over, with her bottom pointed at me. FML
Today, in the doctor's waiting room, a little boy asked me for a cookie. I told him that I didn't have any. He replied, "But my mom says that ladies with big butts always have cookies in their handbags." FML
Today, a hot girl got into the elevator just as I took a bite out of my Three Musketeers bar. I instinctively smiled at her and chocolate drool poured out of my mouth. FML
Today, I found out the "free" protein bars at my gym are actually for a fundraiser for children's cancer. I've been taking one every day for the past two weeks. FML
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Top comments
mismonroe 0
Well, at least they have a marketing strategy. Good for them.
artc91 0
Re-open the door and show them what happens when a fat bitch is insulted.
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Comments (197)
SavannahStar1010 0
The girl scouts I know sell cookies...
Sweet_Testicles 7
Tell them to come back because you want more and then sit on them! ^^
pinkerbell 8
I'm gonna call your bluff on this one. Girl scouts do not sell chocolate bars. They do cookies in the winter and fall product, which is basically nuts and raisin things. There are no girl scouts who will come to your door in the summer with candy bars.
armedandangerous 3
If there is a next time and they pass by, buy some more chocolate bars and tell them: oh yeah us fat bitches love candy.
Mirorbo 27
Damned if you do, damned if you don't. Those girls scare me... If I don't buy, I'm evil. if I do buy, they rip me off, plus I'm a pig. AUGH!
helen29 4
maybe u shouldnt of bought them?
orgasm_blush 4
Hahahaha! Im sorry but that is funny. Sounds a lot like the kids from where i live.
AustrianChaos 3
Sooo.... it's no refunds, right? =/
MerrikBarbarian 9
find out who their group leader is and I form them of their rude ways. I was never a scout but I believe they earn prizes and merits for GOOD behavior. least get the brats stripped of anything they gained selling those bars.
Gruv3r14 1
I would've beat the shit out of their parents.