Today, I was sitting at my college campus; there were good looking girls all around me and I was trying to catch their eye and smile, letting them know I'm available. A butterfly flew by me and I screamed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I literally stopped traffic. I was crossing the street and a butterfly landed on me. Being phobic of butterflies, I had a panic attack in the middle of the road. Oh, and I am 17, captain of our football team, and in very good shape. My girlfriend laughed the hardest. FML
Today, I was attempting to teach a bunch of 2nd and 5th graders on why it's so important to face your fears and try your best. It was going pretty well, until I was attacked by a pair of butterflies. I am afraid of butterflies - I ran away screaming like a little girl. FML
Today, I was sitting in my garden and having a cup of tea while watching some dragonflies. I thought the dragonflies were really pretty, so I ran towards them and tried to catch their tails like I used to when I was a kid. They were exotic wasps. Ouch. FML
Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML
Today, I was walking in the park when I saw an attractive girl walking nearby. I approached her to strike up a conversation when suddenly a large fly invaded my left nostril, and became lodged inside. After picking out the bloody fly pieces, I looked up to see the girl walking away, gagging. FML
Today, I went to a school football game alone. I sat next to these hot girls. To seem cool, I picked up my phone and had a fake conversation with the coolest guy in the grade. Halfway through, he came over and talked to the girls. FML
Today, I dolled myself up and hit the campus gym, hoping to leave with a cute boy's number. I left in a stretcher. FML
Today, I was on the computer in the library on campus. I was Facebook-stalking a really cute girl that I often see on campus. As I'm looking at her profile pictures, I turn around and the girl is standing right behind me. She gave me a disgusted look and walked off. FML
Today, I was hanging out with a group of friends when I got into a conversation with this really attractive girl who I've liked for months. She asked me what school I go to. I sit to her left in biology. FML
Today, I was talking to my best friend about a cute guy that girls are afraid to even speak to, so I then decided to march right up to him and say hello. When he smiled at me, I stood there with my mouth wide open, but I made non-coherent words. He asked me if I was a foreign exchange student. FML
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Top comments
uneekfreak16 0
Are you the same guy with the FML who smashed his own nuts when he got scared and saw a spider on them?
hyper12332 0
haha you little pussy
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Comments (181)
Sanrio90 8
Awwwwwwww hahaha this is adorable.
SarcasticaLy 0
What a puss.
DoctorManhattan 0
It's not like it would've mattered much anyway. Most people -- especially women -- tend to react negatively to smiling. Not only do you have to contend with the whole "If I smile at him, then he might read too much into it and view it as an invitation to harass or rape me" mentality that's been brewing, but you also have to deal with most humans' inability to move beyond our ape instincts: Smiling, for apes, is a sign of aggression. I often find that I wouldn't be the least bit surprised if people scampered up the nearest available tree at the slightest flash of one's teeth.
_bj_ 0
butterflies scare me.
dearViena 0
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH oh i really enjoyed this one
desso 0
This one is quite giggle worthy. I imagine him chatting some girl up and then a butterfly flying behind her and him emitting a short, sharp, high-pitched girly shriek and then continuing with the conversation.
insert_name 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA omg...seriously?
3reezee 0
someone PLEEEASSSSEE illustrate this!!!!!!!
jillz 0
you'll never be a 'real' man so as long as you never even so much as hint that you are, you should be fine with the ladies...at least the ones who don't mind your kind
superkid 0
real men use hair straighteners these days, but none of them should scraem at butterflies... the good thing about being a girl is that i dont look like a douche when i scream at a butterfly.