Jailbird
Today, my dad came out of jail. He showed me his tattoo of a Bible on his chest with all his 13 kids' names on it. I'm the only one whose name is spelled wrong. FML
Today, my dad came out of jail. He showed me his tattoo of a Bible on his chest with all his 13 kids' names on it. I'm the only one whose name is spelled wrong. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad found out I got a tattoo behind his back and is really really upset. When I got home from work my car wasn't in the driveway. When I asked my dad where it was, he replied "you'll get it back when your tattoo comes off." FML
Today, my 18-year-old son got his first tattoo. I would have loved it, if it wasn't a text on his hand with a glaring spelling mistake in it. FML
Today, I heard from my dad for the first time in over six months. It was through Facebook, in a message blaming my brothers and me for his horrible life, and in which he spelled my name wrong. FML
Today, my dad has dementia and has been getting my name wrong with increasing frequency. During one of his lucid moments, he ended up admitting those wrong names are actually of his other 7 kids, my half siblings to various women, 5 in this country and 2 in Europe, but I’m not to tell my mother. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My dad was supposed to take me to get a tattoo, but instead he went to the bar, got drunk, and told me how I was the biggest mistake he and my mom have ever made. FML
Today, my tattoo artist boyfriend of five months gave me my first tattoo in celebration of my 18th birthday. It was supposed to be a heart with my name in script. He spelled my name wrong. FML
Today, I found a necklace that my parents had made for me. While looking at it, I realized my parents had spelled my name wrong. FML
Today, I found out that the phrase I got tattooed on my lower back is misspelled. FML
Today, I came to terms with the fact that my dad will die without knowing I have tattoos on my body. I'm afraid my dad will suffer a deadly heart attack due to the revelation, as he had two heart failures in the past. My dad is still the sort of person who thinks that people with tattoos are criminals. FML
Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML
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Top comments
GirlYouNasty 11
In jail AND can't even spell his kid's name right... Your dad sounds like quite the fella!
perdix 31
Is your name Vasectomy, because your dad evidently cannot spell that either?
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Comments (123)
conman531 23
I love how these Bible/Christian fanatics get tattoos of the cross, Bible, Jesus, etc, even though it clearly states in the Bible that you should not get a tattoo. Leviticus 19:28 reads, "You shall not make any cuts in your body for the dead nor make any tattoo marks on yourselves: I am the Lord."
Ugi 27
It also talks about cutting the edges of your beard but that's the great thing about religion - you can pick and choose which bits you want to adhere to.
ise3 10
Err anyone notice the irony that the bible says no to tattoos?
Bebbo_fml 21
Maybe he got the tattoo in jail. Maybe he only had 12 cigs to pay the artist, and the artist took revenge? Maybe.
fsomelife 26
Thank you for making my day.
wjh100 13
well I wouldn't be to upset 13 kids and jail time. amazing dad i'd think
akiahara 14
I wouldn't set your expectations too high... he's clearly a winner.
xgetxbentx 13
From the way this is worded, I assume he had the tattoo done while in jail? If that's correct, what did you expect? They don't have professional artists in jail, there was bound to be at least one thing wrong and it's going to be **** HIS life when that shit gets infected. My dad has prison tattoos, they don't ever look good, they usually get infected, and they fade in a few years. So he'll need it touched up eventually, perhaps he can fix the spelling of your name then.
ohhitsher 5
Well he got the tattoo done in jail, that was the first problem.
surfergirl72 7
You have 12 brothers and sisters and your dad's been incarcerated. I'd say you've got bigger issues. Teasing...teasing...that sucks. Sometimes the best family is the one you make yourself.
IsRaeliPrinCess 8
13 kids with the same woman??? Or is he a "sperm donor" for a bunch of other women??