Today, it was the first time my fiancé and I have been able to have sex in the daytime for ages. We have two kids under two years-old who take up most of our time, so when we had the opportunity, we grabbed a condom and pounced. Everything was going well until he pulled out… and left the condom inside. Now we can’t find it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had the house to ourselves. We started getting a little frisky when we discovered we were out of condoms. After a quick run to the store, we found ourselves locked out of the house. Now we have condoms, but no way to use them. FML
Today, after having gone off the pill a couple of weeks ago, I finally got my old friskiness back only to find part of a condom wrapper in my husband's pocket. Turns out he was impatient and went elsewhere. FML
Today, the one time, THE ONE TIME, we ran out of condoms and had sex anyway, my girlfriend got pregnant, even though she’s on the pill. I didn’t even orgasm inside her, I had to do a Google search to learn that live sperm can emerge and go inside her even before I orgasm. We are so screwed. FML
Today, while trying anal for the first time, my partner pulled out but the condom got stuck. It was left it dangling outta my butt. FML
Today, I went to take out my NuvaRing. To my surprise, I couldn’t find it. I’ve had unprotected sex almost every day this month. I don’t know when it fell out. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. Before we'd finished, we were interrupted by my ex dropping my daughter off with no notice. In my rush to answer the door, I hopped off my boyfriend. The condom came off inside me. After a few minutes of feeling around, I pulled the condom out, and discovered I was on my period. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when the condom broke. He told me to go put a tampon in to "soak up the kids". How did he graduate? FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML
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Top comments
hopejm 5
just get a plan b pill. I think you have 48 hrs to use it. $50.00 is a lot cheaper than a kid. there's a cheaper brand also. good luck!
lukey101 26
After 2 kids in 2 years I can see why you're using condoms....
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Comments (7)
lukey101 26
After 2 kids in 2 years I can see why you're using condoms....
RichardPencil 32
I have a feeling this wasn't the first birth-control ****-up you guys have had. At least two of them are sleeping in the next room.
hopejm 5
just get a plan b pill. I think you have 48 hrs to use it. $50.00 is a lot cheaper than a kid. there's a cheaper brand also. good luck!
Ellimac21 14
Plan B pill to avoid an unwanted kid As for the condom in the ******, it may come out on it's own in 3 days. If you start feeling sick, go to the gynecologist so they can remove it.
bratmommie 4
Happened to me and my now ex the very first time we had sex... not a fun search!