Today, while on vacation with my boyfriend, I decided it would be a good time to try getting intimate with him for the first time. It turns out his penis is so small that I get more enjoyment from a tampon applicator. We're stuck in this cabin for another five days. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized I get more pleasure from a tampon than my boyfriend I have been having sex with for the past six months. FML
Today, I got my boyfriend's pants down for the first time and turns out my thumb is bigger than his erect penis. I already know he has weak tongue technique, but this is an extra slap in the face I do not need. FML
Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he gets more pleasure out of using a Q-tip than he does having sex with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend in bed after a round of amazing sex. He decided it would be a great time to stick his finger up my nose. FML
Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML
Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. I went slowly to build up the excitement, and I thought it was working really well, until he sighed, "For fuck's sake, it's a dick, not a shotgun." and told me to stop embarrassing him. FML
Today, I'm on my honeymoon. My husband and I cannot consummate our marriage, because his penis has an open wound due to… vigorous masturbation. FML
Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML
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Top comments
bigdaddyeric 37
Who goes on vacation with a dude for a week before trying out his junk? Plus if you’re going to dump him over that, he’s the lucky one....
Allie614032 34
Use toys? Try oral? There are more ways to get pleasure than just regular sex.
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Comments (25)
Dale Gulley 8
Sit on his face till he begs for air...
Rabite 28
Wow, how entitled the people here feel to tell her that she is shallow and that she should just continue having (different) sex with him although she seems to not want it. She can decide for herself if she wants to stick to him and try some other things without needing to hear from other people that she's either lose or too shallow.
Matthew Pierce 2
She's the one who decided to post her personal business on this website for all to see. Seems to me if she didn't want people's opinions, she shouldn't be airing her laundry in public!
Rabite 28
So if a person says something in public it's totally okay to be an a****** to them?
xXDemonWolfXx 13
Yes
lloydgan 6
anyone that read the content is entitled to comment...
Socomsnake 11
I find it funny that when you realized he can't pleasure you the way YOU want, you're suddenly "stuck" in the cabin for 5 more days.
Rabite 28
It's not only about pleasuring. If sex is important to you in a relationship, you might decide to not wanting a relationship with someone you don't have satisfying sex with. It could have been any other dealbreaker.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
It's not the size that counts. It's what you do with it. ;)
Rabite 28
Lol nope.
nevereyes 31
Toys are your best friend and relationships don't need sex to work.
bobsanction 18
That's a dick move of you.
MrCT 22
Probably didn't know he was throwing a hotdog down a hallway or His FML Her vigina was so loose she asked if i was in and I was up to my elbow.... how to tighten a vigina https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5x8vem32MI
bltoth 8
A Big Ho needs a big D*ck. He's lucky to find this out early in your "relationship".
Rabite 28
Anatomy. Look it up.
Matthew Pierce 2
If his penis size is the most important thing to you, it sounds like you need to grow up and find out what true love is really about. This guy would be better off without you!
Rabite 28
Who defined for everybody what love and relationships have to be like? You?
DanielleinDC 34
Have you thought of changing up positions? Rear entry sometimes helps when a man is on the small side. Woman on top is the absolute worst if your guy is small. And hopefully there are other ways he can please you before getting down to business.