Today, I had sex with a guy I'd had a crush on for a long time. When I asked if he was having trouble putting it in, he answered that he was fully in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I made out with the guy I've had a huge crush on for the first time. He wrapped his arms around me, and whispered softly into my ear, "I can't wait to bone you." FML
Today, I finally got together with this great guy I've had a crush on for a while. He told me before that he is quite inexperienced, which usually doesn't bother me at all. Turns out "inexperienced" translates to "I will include your nose and chin in our kissing" in this case. FML
Today, I finally had sex with the guy I like, but I had to pee really bad. It got really wet down there, and he thought I squirted. I peed everywhere. I let him believe he made me squirt. FML
Today, the crush I've had for months finally came over to my place for the first time. It didn't last long however, as I suddenly had to go to the ER for severe testicular pain. FML
Today, after some great sex, my boyfriend mused: "You know, from this position, I could punch you in the cunt and you wouldn't be able to stop me." I could only relax when he finally fell asleep nearly an hour later. FML
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Top comments
tounces7 28
Well, maybe he's good with his tongue since he's clearly not blessed in other ways.
skippydoda 32
That's something that small guys say to make themselves feel better about them.
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Comments (43)
real life problems 26
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe hes not small as much as you are loose.
skippydoda 32
That's something that small guys say to make themselves feel better about them.
real life problems 26
Is that knowledge from personal experience?
Kathleen Doughty 3
You know Vagnias are suppose to "loosen up" when they are turned on right.. But they shrink right back down when they aren't If you have never turned on a woman.. then I see why you are the way you are.
real life problems 26
Jeez, the joke was a stretch alright, loosen up. Theres no need to be so tight
joeyl2008 29
I'm fairly certain OP is talking about anal sex not vaginal sex.
Nhayaa 21
OP is "anonymous". As far as we know, could be a guy...
real life problems 26
True but usually if it's a gay or lesbian post, they use different color fonts.
Emma Marshall 19
Yeah totally. Let's go with that to save your bruised ego lol.
real life problems 26
I couldn't bruise my ego on here even if I tried, considering half of my comments are horrible jokes and the other half is insults to get a rise out of people like you, I think I did okay. Now leave my ego alone, it's small like my penis and very sensitive
joonsson 21
All it takes is 8cm to have sex, the normal ****** is very adaptable and studies have shown girth is more important than length, except to other guys which is pretty gay. If OP couldn’t even feel it he’s either got a micropenis, less than 8cm, in which case there are plenty of other fun stuff you Candi in the bedroom or she’s got herself a hallway. Plus, the ****** can be tightened with excessive if you do have yourself a hallway.
Selene1090 26
Wow, sounds like someone is a bit insecure. By the way, vaginas go back to size, they aren't playdoh. You would know that if you had actually been with a woman.
EmDizzle2007 28
I love how this comment has soooo many thumbs down for proposing the idea that she may simply have a loose ******... all the while she's here complaining about the size of his penis.
Suaria 38
Well the fact is vaginas go back to their normal size no matter how many people you've had sex with. If vaginas got looser depending on how many people you've had sex with that would mean it would never go back to normal size after having a baby. So it is much more of a logical and factual explanation that the person OP had sex with has a small penis than her ****** being too loose.
real life problems 26
I am disappointed with the amount of people taking a joke so seriously lol
michaelscashier 5
You know that’s not how vaginas work right?
tounces7 28
Well, maybe he's good with his tongue since he's clearly not blessed in other ways.
Inkoseh 33
Twist: It was his tongue the whole time!
RichardPencil 32
You really crushed him.
Davros 12
Hey, plug this in on your way out thumb dick.
Mungolikecandy 19
Kegel?
man_in_black08 28
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Ok ur a low self esteemed white girl will sleep with and for anythinh... so stop whining. Get used to ur life
Selene1090 26
Why are there so many insecure guys on this thread? Small dicks are only a problem because you make it one. Get good with your tongue or your hands and most girls won't care.
ChromoTec 24
Or, you know, don't abandon your Christian morals and wait until marriage to have sex.
littlekellilee 45
Holy triggered, Batman!
Mungolikecandy 19
Why the racism?
bobsanction 18
Maybe your ****** is broke.
Nathan Cullins 1
Should have asked, in where??!
jjrae1 5
well she certainly got the short end of the stick .-.
Cali 57
ba-dum-tss
Ghetis 396 11
At least he didn't break up with you after putting it in the wrong hole