Today, I was in church. During the prayer, I moved my foot and it pressed against the automatic button on my umbrella causing it to suddenly open. As if that wasn't bad enough, I screamed simultaneously at the shock. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I entered a stairwell, the fire alarm went off, triggering the automatic fire doors to close. The one I was walking through ran over my foot, ripping my toenail, and then smacked me in the face. FML
Today, I was using a public restroom when the automatic toilet flushed prematurely. The sudden gush of water startled me so much that I jumped up and slipped, hitting my head on the stall door. A concerned stranger had to help me up. FML
Today, as I was closing my car door, I realized I had left the keys in the ignition. Not wanting to lock myself out, I reached to stop the door from closing. Not only did I scream when the door slammed on my hand, but in my furious pain, I leaned on the door, locking my keys inside. FML
Today, I sneaked out of work early. I tripped over my own feet while walking up to my car. As I fell, I managed to hit the panic button on my car keys, setting off my car alarm while I lay flat on the ground in the parking lot. FML
Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shat myself. FML
Today, I tripped while rushing to my classes. In a desperate attempt to regain my balance, I grabbed the nearest thing to me. A fire alarm. FML
Today, I tried to open a door with a dramatic kick, like in the movies. The door didn’t budge, but my shoe flew off and hit me in the face. FML
Today, I tried to quietly leave a public toilet at work without anyone noticing how long I'd been in there. The automatic hand dryer turned on as I walked past, making me jump so hard, I walked straight into the door. FML
Today, during a snowstorm, I opened my car door to get out. The wind snapped it wide open, then immediately changed course and swung it back at me just as I stepped out, spilling an entire hot cup of coffee all over me. FML
Today, at church, I sneezed suddenly and messily into my hand just as the priest asked us to stand and greet our neighbors with a handshake. FML
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Top comments
teentee401 37
Did you at least scream "HOLY SHIT"?
HoboMeth 36
Pray people don't get mad
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Comments (61)
Halfass 8
You can run into the priest's arms, it's ok don't be alarmed. Come with Him. There's no distance between God's love.
RoseCrystal 17
Did you take the Lord's name in vain?
ThatLoneIyGuy 8
Its was a sign of God
ArmchairAnalyst 9
That's what you get for participating in organized religion..
yeahnah27 0
ThatLonelyGuy, theres pretty much none here. But there are people bashing OP for going to church -_-
Railroader 16
really? I just read through the comments and I don't see any bashing,
DoomedGemini 38
Flagging comments is a great thing. There have been a few saying that believing a religion is crap, what they teach is garbage, ect. I don't like anyone pushing their beliefs on others or being condescending, Christian, atheist, or any other.
MissEris 27
It's ok OP. If your church is any bit as boring as mine, it was probably the most fun everyone had that day.
cole66 14
you probably need to find a new church, if you are bored I would imagine it's hard to focus on the preaching
Khaleesi_D 9
This girl had a total freak out during bible study at church camp. We were having the study in our cabin and a couple months before she'd seen the movie Arachnophobia, and apparently there was a spider in her bed. She jumped to another bed and had her friend shake out her sleeping bag.
scrollingthru 10
was it right at that moment when everyone is quiet including the priest/preacher/reverend? That's the perfect time for a commotion.
captainsmegma 12
In my church everyone would have thought the good lord had reached out and smacked you.
streetvybz 8
should have ended it with a hallelujah