Today, I put my sexiest lingerie on, lit candles, put some sensual music on, and got my bed ready to surprise my boyfriend when he came home. I positioned myself in the sexiest pose possible. He came home and didn't come in my room for twenty minutes because of a football game. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend with candles and a sexy outfit. When he came in, he insisted that we needed music to help set the mood. Thirty minutes later, he's still searching for a song. FML
Today, I felt like spicing up our marriage, so I thought I'd surprise my husband when he got home from work. I put on my sexiest teddy, lit some candles, and laid on the bed. He walked in the room, looked at me for a second, farted, then asked me what was for dinner. FML
Today, I wanted to seduce my boyfriend so I put on my sexiest lingerie and started playing mood music. As he was eating dinner, I climbed up on the table and started seductively crawling across to him. The table collapsed under my weight. FML
Today, I got dressed up in lingerie for my boyfriend. He looked at me, said, "Nice," then went back to watching TV and drinking beer. FML
Today, I showed up at my boyfriend's house with nothing under my coat but some sexy lingerie. He told me he was working on an assignment, and made me wait three hours before he'd have sex with me. FML
Today, my boyfriend complained all day about being bored, so wanting to cheer him up, I put on some sexy clothes and went to his house. I got on his bed in my underwear and called him over. He quickly decided he'd rather play Diablo for the next five hours instead. FML
Today, I was at my new apartment. My fiancé was coming home so I filled the apartment with candles and put on some sexy music. When he came up to my door, I answered the door, naked. What I didn't know was that he was bringing his dad to see the new apartment. FML
Today, I was laying on the bed, naked, waiting for my boyfriend to come home since we haven't had sex in almost a month. Hearing him come in, I struck my sexiest pose. He walked into our room and tossed his backpack at me. Not only did we not have sex, his backpack gave me a black eye. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend for a romantic night at home. I put on my hottest little dress, dimmed the lights, and put music on. My boyfriend stumbled in much later, drunk, and took one look at me before throwing up on my feet. FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by dressing up in sexy lingerie. When I went to answer the door he was standing there with a shocked expression, his friends parked in the driveway had the same expression as well. He came to break up with me. He told me after we had sex. FML
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Top comments
flyboy57 0
Haha. YDI for planning it on game night.
009yp 0
can't stop a man from his football
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Comments (48)
larselduderino 0
Yea, whenever I come home from work I am mentally exhausted which takes a slight toll on my desire to exert myself in any physical fashion. Gimme a beer, let me watch part of a football game/UFC match, then we can **** or you can suck me off. Probably the second because you deserve to work alone if he has been doing it for 8 hours earlier in the day.
im_a_dinosaur 0
hahaha awww. i woulda been so pissed
clayton18 0
Well did he know you were up there waiting for that? and maybe next time get inventive and do something while your watching football, or give gime a bj so he can relax a little first, he was probably tired.
DynamicDave 11
38th!
sk8ergirl553 0
maybe he didnt know u were home? god ppl...
lilmissallie 0
lolll true foootball is always before girls lol!
Reus_fml 0
Ma'm... There was a football game on. You don't quite understand, do you? I'll explain. Football matters more than sex. Done. Don't be offended.
soFREAKED 13
I feel like mg boyfriend would do that to me :P