Today, I was at a fancy restaurant. I was drinking some water when I noticed a hot guy eating alone at another table waving at me. I smiled back, but had forgotten to swallow the water so it dribbled out of my mouth all over my shirt. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went out to lunch with a couple of work buddies. Trying to be suave, I started hitting on our waitress. Not two seconds after saying, "Hey baby," I felt ice water on my balls. The guy next to me had spilled both our water glasses. FML
Today, I was at my favorite Mexican restaurant when I realized my really cute waiter, along with his buddies kept looking at me and smiling. Trying to be cool, I took a bite of my burrito, choked, and spilled ground beef down my new shirt and in my bra. They laughed the whole time. FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I really like. Midway through dinner, I felt something stuck in my teeth and, trying to be discreet, attempted to remove it. In the process, I flicked a piece of food across the table and it landed in his drink. He looked at it, then at me, then sighed. FML
Today, I was on a double date at a restaurant with two friends of mine and a guy I really liked. Things started getting really quiet so I decided to start talking to make things a little bit less awkward even though I was eating. I ended up spitting a piece of chicken across the table. FML
Today, I went to a restaurant for a second date. As we were eating, a piece of food got stuck in my teeth. I tried to discreetly remove it, but ended up spitting it across the table and onto my date's glasses. FML
Today, I wasn't feeling well at work. While I was in the bathroom losing my lunch, a very large piece of food came up. The resulting splash of toilet water went straight up into my mouth. FML
Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML
Today, I had a lunch meeting with important people from my company. While drinking from my wine glass someone cracked a joke, causing me to snort a fountain of wine all over my lap, splashing the people next to me. The horrified look on my boss's face sitting opposite me said everything. FML
Today, while at Costco, I was eating a hotdog when I saw a really hot guy walking over. Trying to be sexy, I bit my hotdog cutely and winked. I ended up choking and dropping the ketchup covered hotdog all over my lap. FML
Today, I went to a wine tasting for the first time. I copied the experienced people around me by swishing the wine around in my mouth, which I then choked on and spit out all over my white blouse. FML
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Top comments
AquaRevolver 0
That's gotta suck... but maybe you should remember the swallowing mechanism for next time lol!
PotatoBlankey39 2
ha ha... One of those stupid things in life that just have to happen. I'm sorry. Think of it this way, it always could have been worse. Good luck next time!
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Comments (115)
Ssmartasss 0
Ehh isn't it a kind of instinctive reaction to swallow? You will forget to breath next time?
liveitlearnit 0
FAIL. That sucks, man. I've choked on my own spit when a guy flirted with me, that was also really hot.
just_kidding 0
Harry Potter o_O ? He drives you light-headed, he should be flattered !
maggie_gxx 0
haha i remember one recently like this but it was a guy in an elevator with a snickers bar
ZeronosX 0
learn to swallow
themixedt4pe 0
Blonde moment much?
LilleyWhite 0
how do you "forget" to swallow?
ohhhhshizzz 0
#42: I've never forgotten to breath, nor have I to BREATHE. OP: ROFLLMAOLOL. I really wasn't laughing that much, it's all of the Harry Potter refs. I thought I was a big Potter nerd, and indeed this DID make me think of Harry Potter. OP I bet the cute guy found that really adorable what you did. Meh, a girl DROOLING over him. That is not something that happens everday, he will be VERY flattered, don't you think?
xxguitarfreakxx 0
smile.. FAIL. water... WIN.
24788 7
You must of been really nervous.