Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML
Today, I was set up on my first blind date since my divorce. My expectations were low, but when she showed up, she was a smoking hot. She was way out of my league, she was delightful and kind throughout the date, but my low confidence shined through. That night she acquired an expensive dinner and a stalker. Me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date that my friends set up. Not only did my date visibly recoil at the sight of me, she ended up trying to convince me that we're actually cousins. When I told her how absurd that was, she muttered, "Fuck it" and left. FML
Today, I had a blind date that my friend set me up for. My date was the ugliest, most disgusting person you will ever meet, but I thought that I would give him a chance. He saw me, eyed me up and down, then said to my friend, "You're kidding, right?" FML
Today, I went on a blind date. The guy greeted me with a "What's up, bitch?", which I wrote off as him just being really laid-back. By dessert, he'd asked me if my boobs are real, then when we finished, asked how many more dates it'd take before I put out. So much for that. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. She seemed really nervous, so I tried negging to loosen her up. She decked me. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a coffee shop. I walked up to who I thought was him, smiled, and said, “Hey! You look even cuter in person!” He looked horrified. It wasn’t my date. My actual date witnessed the whole thing and ghosted me mid-latte. FML
Today, I went on a blind date and mistook someone else at the restaurant for my date. We had a great conversation… until the real blind date arrived. The look on both their faces was priceless. FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a local restaurant. When my date walked in, she took one look at me, said "Nope", and walked out. FML
Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML
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Top comments
dashizam 10
So what, it's easily fixed. One flaw is the best you can get! Take it!
priceyfml 7
She could always use dandruff shampoo, good luck :)
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Comments (209)
KiddNYC1O 22
She's a hot pirate!
crazy4uboi 6
Dandruff AND dead skin? You know that's the same thing right?
FML_Whale 18
Get her some Head and Shoulders!
happyp 4
buy some medicated shampoo and next time you are at her house squeeze out all her regular shampoo and fill the bottles up with the medicated one. sorted. or just stop being so shallow. either works.
bohemianrhapsoda 1
Of all things, how is DANDRUFF a deal breaker?! I bet if i scratched your scalp enough i could get some flakes going too. Unless you have some phobia of dead skin, that is just immature.
mattscott 5
Your username is awesome for one, and two, I have a cousin who uses too much hairspray that ends up flaking off, maybe it was that...?
BananerzFresh 12
Nothing a little head and shoulders can't fix.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
OMG I'm sorry but OP's username is hilarious. But still, that's pretty shallow. Shallow to say the date is hot and getting psyched just because of that, and shallow to suddenly find her hideous because of dandruff (which she probably can't help and which also could have been hair spray).
kayaker83 4
Maybe it was too much cheap hairspray... That looks like dandruff too sometimes. I've never had dandruff but I noticed one hairspray made it look like it. Investigate :)
nix1993 41
It could definitely have been dry shampoo... depending on the brand, sometimes if it hasn't been brushed out properly it looks a whole lot like dandruff if you ruffle your hair