Today, while working at the hospital, I had a patient with a blocked bowel. It was so bad, feces were entering into her stomach. While leaning down to talk with her, she threw up. I was both vomited and defecated on at the same time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was helping this girl to the nurse’s office because she was so sick that she could barely walk. About halfway there, she stopped and vomited on me. My jaw was dropped in shock when she threw up on me again. A little went into my mouth. FML
Today, I was working as a paramedic when my patient's colostomy bag exploded all over me. I was covered in fecal matter, with 5 hours left on my shift. FML
Today, I was volunteering at the hospital. This lady was calling the Nurses' Station, and I had to go see what she wanted. When I asked her what she needed, she mumbled something. As I leaned in closer to hear what she was saying, she threw up all over my face. Apparently, she was nauseous. FML
Today, I had food poisoning. I spent all day on the can. I also had a bucket to throw up into at the same time. I was sick out of both ends, at the same time. FML
Today, I was dealing with a psychiatric patient with a colonostomy bag. She got agitated and ripped the bag from her abdomen and threw it at my face. I got a bag filled with poop thrown at my face. FML
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Today, I held a container while a patient tried to throw up in it. She missed. FML
Today, I was suffering from food poisoning and had constant diarrhea, along with feeling nauseous. I couldn't hold my vomit in and rushed to the toilet, but due to the pressure, I pooped while still in pajamas. FML
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
Today, I got food poisoning at work. I had my head in the toilet when the auto flush decided to turn on. The force of the flush was so powerful half of what I threw up splashed back into my face. FML
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Top comments
DarkMirror 0
o.O I think the only thing you can say in that situation is "Oh shit!"
yer_maw 1
SCORE!!!! ahaha kiddin on, that's disgusting
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Comments (339)
anonymous1116 0
It is not a violation of HIPAA because the patient was not identified and her specific case was not discussed. The OP was trying to explain how someone could both vomit and defecate from their mouth simultaneously. There is no way that the patient or her family could determine if this was about her case because it can happen in any hospital to any patient with a blocked bowel. Also, for everyone who keeps saying FHL, yeah, her life sucks too. The OP wasn't trying to say that his life sucks more than hers but if you got crapped or vomited on you would write an fml too because that sucks.
xchd22x 0
FBYL. damn that shit is very disgusting. and a lot of ppl said this earlier on: its like the south park episode where cartman put food up his butt and crapped out his mouth....that is one of my favorite episodes right there.
joeyboy 0
O my gosh imagine the horrible feeling of burping a fart. That stinks for the patient
Vitamin_C 0
OK this is my second time posting, but all you idiots saying it's physically/medically impossible, pick up a ******* textbook or shut up. If poop can't go forward out your ass, it's coming back up out your mouth. Yes, House used this, but just because it was on a TV show doesn't mean it can't happen. Things are exaggerated but they are all true (remember: it's never lupus). Jesus H Christ, ignorant frigging know-it-alls.
coffeennicotine 0
#11, someone I know had colon cancer and he vomited up feces because it'd blocked his whole colon. So med student or not, you're wrong. And I'd hate to go to you as a doctor if you ever graduate. I'm more sorry for the person with the blocked colon than I am the OP. That has to be terrible for them. And you should expect things like that working in the medical field. If you can't handle it, you went into the wrong profession.
rachaelb07 6
And there is reason number one I'm no longer a nursing student.
kungfu 0
Gotta say it... The patient was in a lot of pain, you need to re-think your career if your feeling sorry for yourself when people around you are dying.
KrystleLynn 0
**** HER life.
Budweisser 0
Yes it can happen the very same thing happenedto my mom
Moemoemoe_fml 0
#11 Fail. I fear for your future patients if you pass?