Today, I found out my brand new $3,000 mattress that is supposed to relieve my back pain works amazingly. I only discovered this because my wife, son, daughter, dog, and two cats are all asleep on it and not waking up. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I need a new mattress. Last night, I slept on the floor. It was the best sleep I've had in a while. FML
Today, my $1300 mattress that I bought for my new home was delivered. To my old house. FML
Today, I have such chronic back pain that I can usually never get comfortable, but I found the perfect position to lie in bed, and was nearly 100% pain free. I felt so good. Someone knocked on the door, so I had to answer it. They'd got the wrong house number. I couldn’t find that perfect position again. FML
Today, I bought my dog an expensive orthopedic bed because I felt bad that he was getting older. He sniffed it for 5 seconds, walked away, and spent the night sleeping on the cardboard box it came in. Apparently, the box has better lumbar support. FML
Today, I got back from a holiday. I've been suffering from debilitating muscle spasms in my back for over a year, causing migraines and immobility. After all the physical therapy, drugs, and tests, it seems it was caused simply by my mattress. A week of sleeping in the hotel bed completely alleviated it. FML
Today, I got a new mattress delivered to my house. Didn’t have it on the frame for more than 5 minutes before my cat had already pissed on it. FML
Today, I bought my kids new mattresses for their new beds. Within 24 hours my son did a cannon ball onto his sister's bed to prove that it wouldn't break. The box spring snapped in half. FML
Today, my wife and I had our brand new king-size mattress set delivered. After the delivery men left, she informed me that I was no longer allowed to eat or drink in bed. Oh yeah, and we're not having sex on it either. FML
Today, I found out I was getting a new bed for my room. Then find out it was my great-grandmother's. The one she died in. FML
Today, my fiancé, my two-year-old, and my dog are all sleeping peacefully next to me in our new king-sized memory foam bed. It's 2:15 in the morning. Why am I not sleeping? Because they all snore, one right after the other. It's like an endless song of snoring. FML
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Top comments
Dave_Davington 34
So is this a case of "this is somewhat inconvenient. FML" or "my whole family is now dead (possibly because of my new mattress). FML"?
Tejanoswhy 19
I think it worked a little too well.......
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Comments (35)
lestatsbride 3
slowly move kids from your bed to their own beds, if you nudge pets they move
soullyfe 33
13: They probably wouldn't want to have to move both kids to their rooms considering they suffer with back pain.
Kirari13 3
My family has done this. We just make room for each other. Probably the family was hanging out together and took a family nap. It's fun to do that even when you get older.
HUGBUG 23
I'd be ******* pissed at them and I'd kick them off
aquila0989 7
For all that is holy, please tell me you didn't waste your money on a sleep number bed. Worst bed I ever had. I had it about 2-3 years and it needed repairs like four times. Of course it was only covered by the warranty the first time. I got a knock off foam bed for 1/10 the price and a year later it still is in great shape.
qteabutt 12
You can probably just kick out the pets, and scooch the kids over, maybe that would be enough room for you?
trucker2 33
Lifts mattress, rolls everyone out on the floor, crawls in bed.
bunnyveganlife 5
People are starving all over the world and you think this is an fml? Pathetic.
cheshireau 26
Why are there more than just your wife in your bed? Do you live in a one bedroom apt where your kids don't have their own rooms and the animals don't have beds and blankets in the lounge room or laundry? $3000 is a lot of money and if your back is that bad, why would you allow others to sleep on it instead of you?
MrsHumanFrog 19
dude..... i only paid 700 for a king Tuft & Needle and its Awesome for back pain and arthritis.
pyronexus 12
Get a Purple mattress