Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was locked out of my house. After hours of trying to break the door, I found out I accidentally left a window open. The door, however, still needs to be replaced. FML
Today, my overprotective dad bolted all of my windows shut so that I don't turn out like my sister and sneak out or sneak boys in. FML
Today, I stepped outdoors for a minute. The wind blew the door shut, locking me outside. I've spent the last two hours pounding frantically on the windows, trying to wake my 4 year old son who is inside. I can see him sleeping soundly on the couch. FML
Today, I snuck out to see my girlfriend in the middle of the night. When I got to her house, I decided to throw a rock at her window to wake her up. It broke a hole in the window. FML
Today, I snuck out of the house to go to a party. When I got back later, I tried climbing back up the rope-ladder I'd set up earlier, leading back through my bedroom window. I was halfway up when it broke free. I sprained both my ankles and had to shamefully ring the doorbell to get back in. FML
Today, I came home to find that my house had been broken into. After assessing the loss, I saw a taunting note on the fridge saying, "Locks work best when the door's SHUT." My housekeeper had apparently left the door wide open. FML
Today, I locked myself out of my dorm room. I walked across campus, shoe-less and in nothing but my bathrobe, to find someone who could let me back in. Turns out I hadn't even shut the door properly and so it never actually locked. I can still hear the guy laughing at me. FML
Today, I got locked out of my house. After trying unsuccessfully to jimmy the lock, I managed to climb in through the kitchen window. I soon found out I had an effect on the door after all; it won't open at all any more, even with the right key. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML
Today, I found out I can sneak out of my house... but not back in. FML
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Top comments
btstig 11
Swap her birth control with tic tacs.
zoPwNAgEzo 21
What the ****? What kind of sister would do that? At least you've got a reason for payback, OP
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Comments (98)
lonkite101 14
I thought after "I found", you were going to write "a mountain of condoms all around the trash can".
betty_white 12
what the ? yu have a sick mind friend .. o.o
insanexnh 13
Put hair dye in her shampoo. She'll wake up looking like an Oompa Loompa :D
MrSassypants 34
So I'm guessing she is already an orange midget then, huh?
perdix 31
Is your sister Michael Jackson? That would scare the shit out of me!
icemand90 17
spend the night bashing her window, you can't get in, she can't sleep.
SloppyFlamingo 4
People thumb you down, but I personaly thought this was a good idea.
MrSassypants 34
I am sorry to ask but since I'm so curious, why did you PERSONALLY think it's a good idea?
hahasooo 2
thats a bad idea cuz im sure OP doesnt want their parents to hear.
SloppyFlamingo 4
I personally thought it was a good idea, because it was my personal opinion?
perdix 31
What's your sister doing in your bedroom? Why is she avoiding the usual creepy Swiss Family Robinson incest by locking you out? And Robinson doesn't sound very Swiss, does it?
OneLoveOneLove 0
Herpa Derp.. Just ring the door bell and tell your parents that your sister locked you out :D
TheVelocirabbit 10
But she snuck out. So how will she explain how she got outside?
A7XCamaro 19
He could just say that he thought he heard a strange noise outside. He then went to investigate what the noise was and his sister locked him out.
TheVelocirabbit 10
One does not simply hear a strange noise and "investigate". Nah, just kidding. It's actually a pretty good idea. Just as long as OP isn't scared of the dark or heard some strange stories, like me.
writergirl23 19
Found a computer outside, OP?
insanexnh 13
Or maybe he wrote the FML from his phone...?
totalnewbeeee 1
Okay so what you do is text er saying that she obviously violated the sibling code meaning one day when she does because she will do something stupid you have the right to violate this code... But if your a good sibling you'll help her and she will feel so guilty... Trust me
t_raw1234 11
Sister 1- op 0
Briiyahh 7
Don't sneak out if you have that kind of sister... FYL