Today, I had no choice but to shake the hand of a customer who, just moments before, had the aforementioned hand down the front of his pants, scratching his snowglobes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I fistbumped a cashier as they tried to hand me my change. FML
Today, I was checking out a customer who seemed quite friendly. As I finished, he reached slightly over the counter and I impulsively reached out and shook his hand. He gave me a dumbfounded look and said, "Can I have my change please?" FML
Today, I was chatting with a customer who comes regularly to my job. He sticks his hand out and I put my hand on his, thinking he's giving me a high five. He was just waiting for his receipt. FML
Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML
Today, while I was working the drive-thru window, a customer sneezed into his hand and then handed me his money. FML
Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML
Today, I was working at my retail job. A customer stopped me on my way to break saying "someone" had broken a snow globe. She showed me where it was and I cleaned it up with her circling me. I finished and put the cleaning supplies away when I heard a 'crash' as the same woman dropped another snow globe. FML
Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalized a deal. I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointed out that he was just trying to make my breasts jiggle. I'm a man. FML
Today, I went into to shake a big wig's hand at work, and he went in for a hug. I couldn't pull my hand away fast enough, so I cupped his entire titty for at least 10 seconds. FML
Today, at church, while everyone was shaking hands and saying, “Peace be with you” to one another, a man took out hand sanitizer and washed his hands after he shook mine. And only mine. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
"Snowglobes" I chortled.
katy513 0
I can't believe you said snowglobes.
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Comments (125)
Mourningstar 4
There is ALWAYS a choice!!!
lekiat 0
should have given him a hug instead
Schiffy 18
You should have just held out your other hand
danman113 0
snowglobes.... very cool name for them :3
lemonzone25 17
Haha snowglobes :) FYL OP
FatElie 0
Print out the Man Laws and show them to him. It clearly states that while you are allowed to scratch, there is to be no 'handshaking' thereafter.
ters19 10
sounds yummy lol jk (no ****)
beast72 0
bahahaha who the hell calls them snowglobes!?
HannahPaloozah 0
wats a telugu ?
HannahPaloozah 0
u shoulda shook his other hand or been like " ah no, I kno where that's been "