Today, I had no choice but to shake the hand of a customer who, just moments before, had the aforementioned hand down the front of his pants, scratching his snowglobes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I fistbumped a cashier as they tried to hand me my change. FML
Today, I was checking out a customer who seemed quite friendly. As I finished, he reached slightly over the counter and I impulsively reached out and shook his hand. He gave me a dumbfounded look and said, "Can I have my change please?" FML
Today, I was chatting with a customer who comes regularly to my job. He sticks his hand out and I put my hand on his, thinking he's giving me a high five. He was just waiting for his receipt. FML
Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML
Today, while I was working the drive-thru window, a customer sneezed into his hand and then handed me his money. FML
Today, while at work, a customer came up to me, stuck his finger in my armpit, then licked his finger. FML
Today, I was working at my retail job. A customer stopped me on my way to break saying "someone" had broken a snow globe. She showed me where it was and I cleaned it up with her circling me. I finished and put the cleaning supplies away when I heard a 'crash' as the same woman dropped another snow globe. FML
Today, at work at a car dealership, a seemingly overzealous customer shook my hand vigorously after we finalized a deal. I didn't think anything of it until a coworker pointed out that he was just trying to make my breasts jiggle. I'm a man. FML
Today, I went into to shake a big wig's hand at work, and he went in for a hug. I couldn't pull my hand away fast enough, so I cupped his entire titty for at least 10 seconds. FML
Today, at church, while everyone was shaking hands and saying, “Peace be with you” to one another, a man took out hand sanitizer and washed his hands after he shook mine. And only mine. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
"Snowglobes" I chortled.
katy513 0
I can't believe you said snowglobes.
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Comments (125)
my2centsworth 15
Wipe......Wipe.......WIPE!!!!!!
ohSNAPyall 27
You got crabs, ass-face!
jamnglamgirlie 17
How do u deserve this nobody deserves 2 have something so gross 2 happen 2 thm. And op thts y u should always carry hand sanitizer with u. U shouldve squirted some on his hand when he extended it. Idc if it's rude. But the difference with me is tht i only do it when i see the person doing something nasty like picking thr nose.
cryssycakesx3 23
it's unfortunate that all of your vowels broke at the same time.
theannonymousone 0
Those must be really really small snowglobes.
PahhDee 0
Ahaha! xD
SluggerJ 7
wow!! nice
Faleni 4
lol wash your hands op you'll be good sometimes we have to do things we don't want to :)
InsaneGenius 0
I would say you had a choice, but were afraid to get in trouble if you didn't. You don't have to touch someones hand that's been rolling their balls around. Gross.
fester420 2
peoples hands and face have more disgusting things on them than their ass or balls.
veritoswty6 14
eeeeww.. "snowglobes" that's a funny one.. :)