Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say, "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the phone rang, it was some woman who wanted to speak to my dad. “It’s probably his mistress,” I said jokingly. Turns out it was. FML
Today, my mom called while I was at a job interview. I ignored the call, but the interviewer was so offended by the fact I'd rudely left it on at all, that he threw me out. I found out from my mom later that she'd called to wish me good luck. FML
Today, after long day at work, I stopped by my parents' house to say hi. After 30 minutes into the visit, my dad turns to me and asks, "Did you really have to stop by while I was balls deep?" Apparently I interrupted my parents' sex time. FML
Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said, "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw." It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parents' house and forgot his phone. FML
Today, while driving with my step mother, she attempted to have phone sex with my dad. FML
Today, my dad's boss called our house and I answered. He said, "Is your dad home?" I replied, "I'll go check." I put the phone on mute and asked my dad if he wanted to talk to his boss. My dad says, "Does that asshole not have a life?" Turns out the phone wasn't on mute, it was on speaker. FML
Today, I got a call from my dad asking if I was a porno actress. I am. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having phone sex. It got very wild and soon was interrupted by a knock on my door. My dad had come home early from work, and heard the whole thing. He demanded my boyfriend to come over, and he had a sex talk with him on the couch in front of the whole family. FML
Today, my dad thought it was perfectly acceptable to ask my girlfriend how many guys she screwed before me. FML
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Top comments
Mercyfulsin 7
I'd suggest putting the phone on silent next time you go for a job interview!
HotBox69 4
Haha, that's ******* hilarious
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Comments (82)
kylu7373 16
Who keeps their ringer on during a job interview???
Bloink 25
OP's dad already ****** one thing, no need to **** another
nomtard 16
Ydi for answering your phone during an interview.
DaisyDanger 7
YDI for not turning your phone off during an interview!
OlePal 8
your dad sucks
wvcheesehead 13
That may be the most inappropriate thing of which I have ever heard. Not just the call during the interview, but for your father to disrespect your mother in that way. No wonder the world has declined to the current state of moral ambiguity with role models as such.
gracehi 33
I think you're reading too much into this.
TaylorWhiteGirl 15
YDI, never answer your phone during an interview.
iwadasn 33
Obviously your dad shouldn't have done that, but I still have to say YDI for not having your phone off or on silent during the interview.
Dean3000 6
Why the **** do you answer your phone in an interview? YDI.
sweetbliss3 37
hold on. hello. I just ****** your mom. okay cool. sorry, that was my dad saying he ****** my mom. what the ****?! Turn your phone off or mute it next time.