Today, I woke up to 70 new text messages and 100 calls, all from numbers I didn't know. The night before I got into a heated argument with my old best friend about who was prettier. She got mad and posted my number on Craigslist as a prostitute. Apparently I won. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my friend made a fake account on Facebook, pretending to be a girl, and posted my phone number on a sexting group. I've been getting calls and text messages from horny weirdos all day long. FML
Today, my friend posted my phone number all over the Internet, claiming I was a deranged stalker who prank called her. I was calling from my new number to give it to her. FML
Today, I got an angry text from a random number calling me a lying piece of shit. I then realized that was the first person to text me in weeks. I ended up having a fake argument with someone because I was so lonely. FML
Today, when I woke up I checked my phone for messages, only to hear a woman screaming that I have been sleeping with her husband and that she is sending her 'people' after me. I have never met said husband. I panicked for hours, only to receive a call telling me she had dialed the wrong number. FML
Today, to get back at me for breaking up with him, my ex-boyfriend thought it would be really funny to post semi nude pictures of me on Craigslist. To top it off, he decided to give all 200+ people who responded to my ad my home phone number. I'm getting non-stop calls from horny freaks. FML
Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
Today, I was hanging out with my best friend. I have been getting explicit texts and phone calls so I just joking said to my friend, "I think someone wrote my number on a bathroom stall." At which point he said, "Sorry, I didn't think people really called those numbers." FML
Today, I got a text from a call girl. She asked me to delete her number because I'm too demanding. FML
Today, I got a Facebook message from a guy from my old school. I didn’t remember him, but I replied anyway. When I checked my phone after work, I had 73 new messages that went from, “How have you been?” to, “Fuck you ugly cockteasing whore,” and ended with, “You better hope I don’t catch you!” FML
Today, someone posted online a listing for a bicycle for sale, and accidentally put my phone number instead of their own. I have received more calls in one day than I have from friends and family in a week. FML
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Top comments
UrLifeDoesntSuck 0
YDI for having a "heated argument" about who is prettier. Friendly teasing? That's fine. Argument that escalates into posting your phone number on craigslist? WTF.
TerAki 0
lol narcissism
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Comments (213)
Dixon_33 0
thats hilarious, stuff like that is what makes this sight so good
PhysOptGuy 0
Try deflating your ego a bit. People don't like it when you're a self-absorbed douche.
dcapp 0
hahahahah #8 but yeah at least you won
blackfiredudette 0
What kind of stupid argument is that? Life would most likely be better for you if both of you weren't so damn vain. Get over yourself.
wickedsick 0
pshh. arguing over who's prettier. thats so immature. both of you. shes even more immature though. but at least she didnt post your address. now THAT would've been interesting.
isabella12195 0
this shouldn't be on FML, you know you flattered!!!
naku_fml 0
arguing over who's prettier. GROW UP!
jerrycurls 1
see #10
Kamicase 0
Where's the FML? You just got got a confirmation from a ton of people, that you look good. O_o That your number is now "contaminated" should be something you should be able to solve with a talk to your phone company.
a_z_0_9__fml 0
#10 has got it right