Today, I went to Walmart with my girlfriend. We bought the usual, food, Advil and condoms. While I waited in line, she went to grab everything. When she came back, I looked in the cart and saw no condoms. I asked her why she didn't get any. She replied, "They ran out of smalls." Everyone laughed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was buying condoms at Walmart. I grabbed the XL size, and the cashier commented, "Ahh, you'll definitely need a smaller size." FML
Today, I nervously went to the store to buy condoms for the first time. I felt like everything was going well, and checked out happily. As I was walking out, the cashier lady said to the woman next in line, "He thinks he's going to need condoms." They both looked at me and started laughing. FML
Today, I went to the store to buy some condoms. I couldn't find them anywhere, so I nervously asked a staff member for help. She scowled, pointed at the shelf directly behind me, and told me to, "Get a life. Or better pick-up lines." I'll never live down the snickers from the other customers. FML
Today, I went out to buy a bottle of wine and some condoms. As the cashier scanned the condoms, she snickered and muttered, "Yeah right." She was right; I really was just desperate to look like I have a sex life. I got so upset that I left my items and walked out with tears in my eyes. FML
Today, I went to the drug store to pick up a few things. After looking for condoms for 15 minutes, I asked the cashier where I could find them. She said they keep them behind the counter due to theft. She refused to sell them to me, because they're for customers who might actually need them. FML
Today, I went grocery shopping with my toddler. At the checkout, I realized that I forgot my wallet at home. As I frantically searched my purse, my toddler shouted, "Mommy, do we need this?" and held up a box of condoms she'd grabbed from a nearby shelf. Everyone stared. FML
Today, I was at the store, when I saw my boyfriend in line in front of me. I looked to see what he was purchasing; it was a pack of condoms. When I questioned him, he said that, "They're for us, babe!" We already have an unopened pack at home, and it's my time of the month. FML
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Today, I was standing in line at the checkout, and my children were arguing with each other. The guy in front of me sighed loudly and told me over his shoulder: "There're these things called condoms, you know." FML
Today, I was buying condoms for my girlfriend and myself. While at the checkout counter, my guy friend sees me, runs to me, puts his arm around me, kisses me on the cheek, then yells "Thank you baby!" There were about twenty people behind me, they all gave me dirty looks. FML
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Top comments
vanillamelody 0
Don't feel too badly about it... obviously a LOT more people have this same dilemma, seeing as how Walmart RAN OUT of small condoms!
Daaniellee1234 8
ahahahah, not going to lie, I would have laughed to.
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Comments (122)
JKfusion 0
to #38, you hav no idea what kids learn, so stop acting like you do. us kids were taught sex Ed in like 6th grade. we aren't ******* 'ignorant breeders'
user_001 1
Ever hear of a sports injury that doesn't really need surgery but needs rest and inflammation control. Yeah, that is what taking a constant dose of ibuprofen may be for, hence the Advil. I guess I'm expecting too much out of most posters who frequent FML.
PooterBear 0
aww i know how you feel once at the store my boyfriend asked if i needed tampons he was at the cashregester
FoundManyLemons 0
@DarthFurby: Actually they do. Ever seen Magnum or Magnum XLs? A few millimeters this way or that can make a significant difference in comfort and security of fit. Of course, small-size condoms are harder to find since most guys would rather have the condom slide off than buy a box of "snug fit" rubbers. @OP: http://secure.condomania.com/products.asp?dept=18
KillaKingPerrie 4
guess someones not getting lucky today
huhhh 0
YDI for having a small penis.
magenkyo 0
yeah they only come in two sizes regular and black. but to be fair some condoms are more snug than others.
cola87 0
Hmm...I didn't know they came in smalls. I just thought there were regulars and then XL size.
lway2009 0
YDI - if this is true - YDI for being with such a bitcb.
lway2009 0
YDI - if this is true - YDI for being with such a bitcb.