Today, my dog started limping as we were walking home. I thought she'd hurt herself, so I picked her up and carried her home. Once we arrived, I put her down, at which point she ran around and played as if nothing had happened. I fell for my lazy dog's plan to get me to carry her home. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I thought it would be nice to take my obese dog for a walk, since she hasn't had one in a long time. She was doing great, until we were about a mile from our house. She plopped down on the ground and wouldn't move. Nobody was home so I had to carry her all the way back to our house. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he decided that he was too lazy to continue walking. It ended up with me looking like a crazy dog lady carrying my medium-sized dog home. FML
Today, I came home on crutches. My dog was immediately afraid of them, and came running towards me, growling and barking. She ran right into me, knocking me over. FML
Today, my dog decided to chase a smaller dog for three blocks. When I finally caught up with him, he laid down and refused to go anywhere. I had to carry my 80 pounds Labrador like a baby all the way home. FML
Today, I've just moved into a new apartment. It's also the day my big baby of a dog stepped on a rock and began yelping when I tried to touch his paw. He "suddenly" felt better after I carried him inside. Now everyone thinks I'm beating my dog. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when another dog barked at him. My dog ran, pulling me with him. I fell to the ground in pain, with my hand still holding the leash. FML
Today, I was walking my dog but every time he looked like he was about to "go", he became uninterested with the spot and kept walking. I, following behind, tripped over a bump in the sidewalk and face planted. My dog then finally urinated, all over my aching body. FML
Today, my dog wanted to go upstairs, but she has stitches and was having trouble. So I carried her to the top, at which point she peed all over my carpet. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs. My mom came running from the other room because she thought it was the dog. She rolled her eyes and walked away when she saw it was me. FML
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Top comments
Peach3 1
That awkward moment when you realize your dog is smarter than you...
kingsley_fml 8
What a bitch.
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Comments (228)
megsawesome 0
Wow. Talk about a player!
laurenlynn99 0
Dogs are really beginning to outsmart people.
Acaprice14 9
Or the dog wanted to show you who the bitch of the family was.
feranmi101 0
That is a smart ass dog damn where did you get him and what do you feed him ?
evilplatypus 39
Like a boss...
CoolRainbowdash 15
Like a bitch...
ThatLooksSticky 16
I hope your dog doesn't start talking to you & telling you to sacrifice humans.
ClassyCommando 13
What the hell do you think Scientologists are for?
LaColombianita 26
Next time you limp and see if he/she offers you a ride lol
S0CCERSTAR01 2
Man best friend for a reason
naddification 7
NO MORE NEXT TIME.
LiyIa_fml 8
My dog just stops and wont move anymore. I have a bejoun freeze. So, I believe Dogs truly are getting smarter. Lol