Embarrassing, Dogs, Contraception and Intimacy: Gettin' some - FML

Gettin' some

By Username - 01/05/2011 08:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriend's dog. After several trips around the block, and plenty of strange looks, I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML

agreeclassic 17 515

vote type 1 46 436

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By Jake - 02/10/2012 11:52 - United States - Athens

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Today, I woke up with a used condom on my face. Turns out my roommate had sex with his girlfriend during the night and instead of getting up and throwing it away, he decided to throw it across the room. FML

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By PCJJacket - 05/05/2014 17:30 - United States - Los Angeles

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Today, I had sex with my girlfriend while my parents were out. After they got home, my dog brought out our used condom. FML

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By Tucker - 18/11/2009 21:35 - United States

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Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called him down. He came running down the stairs with a used condom in his mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. He put it directly in my mom's hands. FML

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By ash - 04/01/2011 21:09 - United States

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Today, it was my boyfriend's last night visiting my family. My dog decided to go through the trash, then run up to my dad with one of our used condoms caught in her teeth. My parents didn't even know we were sleeping in the same room. They know a lot more now. FML

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By Anonymous - 15/01/2011 10:19 - United Kingdom

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Today, I was at my girlfriends house. After having sex, we went downstairs to where the rest of the family was. At this point I did not realise that I had a used condom stuck to my foot. The family did. FML

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By anonymous - 08/01/2015 19:10 - United States - Noblesville

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Today, after getting into bed, I found a used condom under my covers. I asked my roommate about it. She freely admitted that since my bed was comfier than hers, she had sex with her boyfriend on it. FML

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By Anonymous - 31/07/2012 03:36 - United States - Chicago

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Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML

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By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay

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Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

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By Anonymous - 24/02/2025 12:00 - Slovenia - Ljubljana

Spicy

Today, my ex and I had sex. Afterwards, I cleaned myself with a t-shirt and left a huge sperm stain on the front of it. After that, my stepfather came home, so we left. As we were sitting in the car in front of the house, my stepfather left on a bicycle, wearing the t-shirt. Sunlight reflected off the stain. FML

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By coldwetnose - 09/05/2011 06:08 - United States

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Today, my phone alarm woke me up. It had fallen under my boyfriend's bed. Naked, I got on all fours to retrieve it. My boyfriend's dog stuck his nose in my ass. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

mandi4murphy 0

Sunday 1 May 2011 19:05

I'm pretty sure you should have seen that before you left the house hun. gross

juliahockey 0

Sunday 1 May 2011 19:04

that's disgusting. YDI definitley.

Comments

Slipknot666Maggo 0

Monday 2 May 2011 1:46

YDI for not throwing that out.

spanishfool 0

Monday 2 May 2011 2:57

atleast you guys were being safe

dealwithit84 0

Monday 2 May 2011 3:06

you nasty

ILoveYourDespair 0

Monday 2 May 2011 4:08

Why WOULDN'T you throw a condom out right after you used it? YDI

mbouf 0

Monday 2 May 2011 4:53

why would you throw a used condom on the floor? That is gross. Should have been thrown out right after sex. YDI

THEgirlNEXTdoor0_fml 8

Monday 2 May 2011 5:20

haahhahahahahahhaah...

devinewind 4

Monday 2 May 2011 5:51

If you just let him raw dog it wouldn't be a problem.

YouReallyDeserve_fml 0

Monday 2 May 2011 6:53

Maybe take a shower in the morning.

hamsmum 2

Monday 2 May 2011 16:12

Dispose of that sh*t! Not on the floor, fool!!

missvic_fml 0

Monday 2 May 2011 18:02

that is so disgusting, who throws a use condom on the ground? clean up after your done and throw it in the trash

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