Today, at the restaurant where I work, a guest choked on a bone from her crosscut ribs. She asked me to bring the manager over, so I did. When he got there, she complained that the bone could have seriously injured her, and we should be more careful of where we put the bones in the ribs. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I attended my first meeting with my bosses. For lunch we went to a restaurant. I choked on a piece of meat and couldn't breathe anymore. I had to take that piece of meat out of my throat with my fingers, and then put it back on my plate all chewed up. FML
Today, I had a violent coughing fit while at the store, which caused a lady to think I was choking, grab me from behind and start doing the Heimlich maneuver incorrectly. She broke two of my ribs. FML
Today, I was on a date when a woman across the restaurant started choking on food, so I and a few others rushed to help her. We got her to cough up the food but as I looked back to my date, she was stealing food from the plates of other people who'd left their tables to help. FML
Today, one of the guests I was in the middle of seating knocked an empty wine glass from the table. I assured them it was all right, and kneeled down to pick up the now broken glass. The lady insisted on helping, as far as picking the glass up and dumping the shards into my open hands. FML
Today, while at a restaurant, I watched in horror as my daughter picked a hair out of her food and continued eating it. FML
Today, I came back to my dormitory after a long shift at work. After using the toilet, I looked at myself in the mirror, only to find a huge piece of food stuck between my front teeth. I work at one of the fanciest restaurants in town; nobody bothered to tell me anything. FML
Today, at my job serving, I went to clear the plates when a guy said, "Hold on a second." Thinking he wasn't quite finished, I went to put the plate back. He then reached into his mouth, pulled out a dark brown object and threw it on the plate. It was a rotten tooth. I almost puked. FML
Today, I was sitting in the break room at work eating lunch when I started to choke. My face turned red and tears began welling up in my eyes. Two of my coworkers were there. They began to argue over who would have to give me the Heimlich maneuver rather than helping. FML
Today, I was preparing a customer's meal in my restaurant's kitchen, when I choked on my own saliva and went into a coughing fit. The head chef, who's always hated my guts, accused me of trying to hock a loogie into the meal and fired me on the spot. FML
Today, I asked a girl at the restaurant I work at if she'd had enough to eat. When she said yes, I said, "Are you sure?" I didn't realize how insulting it sounded until her equally overweight mom was up in my face, demanding to see my manager. FML
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Top comments
baseballbv 17
It's sad that these people exist. Thank goodness for natural selection.
Synoptical 10
People like that are why we can't have nice things.
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Comments (103)
Rodville 28
There is so much safety awareness these days so people like her didn't die when they ate too many crayons. We basically bypassed natural selection.
nightbirdblue 27
Plus they have children, often many as they don't understand methods to prevent that. People that don't see the problem with the pinned to the board condom picture are a good example of that.
Sakuraashita 15
You literally just described the plot to the movie Idiocracy, if you haven't seen it, you'd probably like it.
Arwen_Evenstar 37
Dude, spoiler alert!
Axipiter 24
Idiocracy is pretty much the scariest documentary ever... I just keep waiting for things to turn out that way. The first mention of electrolytes and I'm runnin'!
AH1Zviper 15
Boy would I have a bone to pick if I was in your position OP.
Bboy_DiSpirit 24
Do you work at applebees
worldclassrager 41
Maybe have them more fall of the bone or maybe an option or the bones taken out for a little extra
jerryj 27
Extra bonus if the additional staff member sits next to the client at the table and professionally picks the bones out in front of them.
jake_braves 25
23, you just came up with a new career. Do we need a new degree for that? Let's call it "meat-bone and common sense"
devildog562 33
Way to bury the bone in her throat. Very dangerous.
Tawnkat 13
People that stupid should be required to get "stupid" tattoos on their foreheads...
mattiscg 22
perfect example of social Darwin ism not working fast enough
olpally 33
Oh for ***** sake, she's an idiot... :/ please give her back to god.
Reihna_fml 14
My first thought was that this particular customer must be part of the family that thinks deer crossing signs should be moved because in some places the traffic is too heavy for the deer, and they need to cross elsewhere...
zdane 9
I'm always careful when aiming my bone towards the ribs