Today, while at my boxing gym, an old man came inside and did the oddest drunk dance in order to serenade me. I'm a fighter and fine with taking punches to the face, but froze in terror at the sight of this. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while at a local bar, my friends and I were approached by an overly intoxicated man who asked us each politely if we wanted to fight. Thinking it was a joke, I said yes. It wasn't a joke, I now have a broken nose and a black eye. FML
Today, I was at the extremely crowded gym when someone came up behind me and shouted in my ear scaring the living shit out of me. I jump into a karate pose in front of everyone. No one was behind me. It was a new song starting on my headphones. A trainer asked me if I needed an ambulance. FML
Today, I saw an old homeless man who had just fallen down due to his drinking. Everyone laughed at him, but I felt bad, so I went to help him up. My reward? A quick punch in the face, landing me in the hospital. FML
Today, I helped an old man who fell over. Turns out he was drunk and had pissed himself. He decided to thank me with a hug. FML
Today, my friend invited me to his boxing club for the first time. Since I'm somewhat short and scrawny-looking, he was worried that the workout would be too difficult for me. I waved him off and told him that I was tougher than I looked. Five minutes into class, I sprained my ankle. FML
Today, a drunk in a wheelchair tried to fight me. I walked away as he kept hurling insults. He then rammed his chair into my legs, making me fall. I walked away again. Upon the second time, I got up and punched him dead in his face, knocking him backward. I was tackled to the ground for hitting him. FML
Today, I started training for a charity boxing match. When I got home and walked through the door, my dad punched me in the stomach to test my reaction time. As I lay on the floor trying to catch my breath, he said my reaction time was "terrible". FML
Today, I decided to challenge the jerk jock at work to a fight, since he kept poking fun at me for being a weakling. Having started taking MMA classes, I was confident I'd make him eat his words. Just my luck, he's an MMA instructor and kicked my ass effortlessly. Not what I had planned. FML
Today, I saw an old man struggling with three bags, so I offered to carry them for him. He must not have heard me because when I bent down to take the bags, he thought I was stealing them and punched me in the face. FML
Today, my friends showed me a video of me blind drunk last night, getting into a fight with my front door. The door won, unlike my face. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
torio123 27
sounds like you had a good day ;)
xrainbowshadowx 17
The old man has been here long enough to know how the freeze his opponents.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (81)
saIty 17
It's the legendary Drunk Tiger Master. Usually used in martial arts, but somehow he incorporated it into boxing. Bow down to his greatness.
brokenpromisespr 0
Hahahaha holy crap that's funni xD
Wheredidgrungego 12
So I guess you couldn't fight a drunk old man then. Looks like you're going to have to quit boxing because the reigning champ is indeed, that same drunk old man. Sucks.
perdix 31
He was probably your next opponent's coach, and he just figured out how to beat you. Now, all he's got to do is teach his guy the odd drunk dance and clock you when you're in your frozen stupor.
JokeMeister 0
hope ur a chick
xShannonxSammyx 7
I don't blame you- sounds terrifying.
markusse 0
If you're a Girl, you're Not a fighter
SeasonedLemur 5
My girlfriend punches harder than my best friend, and I bet you're a right pussy, she'd mess your face up.
Redheadedrage 5
Yeah that woman boxer would stomp your pussy ass.
socialdisease 1
You know shit's gone down when the FML team has to reply to your stupidity.
hahalaughing 0
listen here ******! you get your pussy ass down here and i'll beat the shit outta you!
eharmonee 0
Hahahaha yes!!! Good job everybody that replies to this. Oh and btw I'm a girl and training to be a fighter so **** you! :)
torio123 27
sexist bastard.
hahalaughing 0
youre a dousche!!!!! get your pony ass down here and i'll beat the shit outta you. im a girl.
brainnerd 0
He doesnt need the attention folks. Cavemen want to be noticed as that's all they can do with their minuscule brains.
sexxme 9
ha why don't you come up to my face and tell me girls can't fight, right after i beat the living shit out of you.
Millseh 0
Says the guy who's too pussy to show his face on FML.
jello17 0
Its just a drunk guy dancing. You must not be able to go downtown anywhere, they're everywhere. Sometimes doing things more terrifying than dancing.
daxter136 0
Only in SF
WOLFEYES72 2
Your pic = win. Now if only OP imagined the drunk man as Justin Bieber...
Buttsexpirate 9
Must've been jackie chan preparing for the third drunken master movie.