Today, I was stuck in a room with a man who was catching flies. That I could cope with, until he insisted on turning the lights out because it was 'stressing out' his flies. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I put up one of those hanging fly catchers in my room due to the unsettling amount of flies in the house. I remarked how stupid flies were to land on them. Within an hour, I got up and walked straight into it. FML
Today, I walked past my fly strip while a fly who had been caught, but hadn't yet died, was on it. While I was there, I could hear his frantic buzzing and see his little arms flailing like mad as he tried in vain to escape. Great. Now I feel like shit for putting these things up. What kind of a monster am I? FML
Today, I walked into my son's room only to be attacked by a swarm of flies. I'm afraid to go back in there. FML
Today, I keep killing flies in my room, probably dozens on a daily basis, and yet every day there seems to be more of them. I have to sleep backwards in my bed so the droning of the fan drowns out the buzzing noise, or else I can't sleep. Even then, I sometimes jump awake when one lands on my ear, which is often. FML
Today, I've become so accustomed to having flies in my house that I just gave up on getting rid of them. I only kill the ones that repeatedly land on my face or, worst of all, in my ears. Especially when they get stuck in my hair. FML
Today, for the third day in a row, I have been volunteered to kill and dispose of the bugs entering my apartment. I live with two "manly" men who can't use a flyswatter. FML
Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML
Today, I was at work and a lady screamed at my manager for about 15 minutes, saying I needed to be fired because I couldn't get rid of all the flies buzzing around her food. She was the one who chose to eat on our patio. FML
Today, I learned that my house's fly infestation is worse than I thought. I now have maggots crawling and dropping from my ceiling. I have to sleep under them. FML
Today, I tried to smack a fly that was buzzing around my room. I ended up hitting the wall a little too hard, scaring my cat, who jumped up and ran under the bed, knocking over a lamp. The fly is fine. FML
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Top comments
xrainbowshadowx 17
And why exactly were you stuck in a room with a guy like that?
your_ma 27
What a proper mental!
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Comments (47)
asmburrrrr 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Haha omg
FFPulley 9
It's a Change (In the House of Flies). That's creepy though.
eminemchick 19
getting the job done right.
LiveLaughFML 10
cause I'd get a thousand hugs, from ten thousand lightning bugs, as they tried to teach me how to dance :D
GrammerNazi1000 8
Oh, how I love Australia. Too bad in Adelaide we don't have people like that allowed in public.
dropdeadtrollin 0
Stupid post to get first, you mine as well have just said "HERPDERP 1ST OMGLOL I'M AWESOME. " To OP, that story doesn't quite make sense why were you in the same room as a bunch of flies and subsequently in a room with a dude who wants to catch them and make them his slaves?
schmelia 10
19 - there are lots of flies in Western Australia, and it can be pretty hard to stop them getting inside.
Friaza 29
Hopefully the guy isn't OP's room mate o_e
Tjack_atack 0
lord of the flies :p
chuckychan 8
but what were you in for?
Keyman1212 14
I have a feeling that someone who catches flies to keep as pets also might molest people in the dark.
enonymous 9
Daniel San turn off light ... you stress out fly. My chopsticks not that fast.
Yngve_fml 9
Sounds like you're in kind of a FLY situatio.. No. Stupid puns are stupid.
ohthestupidity 4
maybe he was trying to eat them :/ They're very hard to catch though, props to him!! My friend and I were trying to catch one to observe it under the microscope, but no luck in the whole hr that we were out "hunting them".
Fekenator 0
Wha..?
fakeaccountX 6
I wonder how you were stuck in a room with him in the first place.
shadexilmaendu 4
Your icon is creepy. Seriously. That things staring into my ******* soul.
FFPulley 9
Really? I make a deftones reference and get nothing but the person that made the lil corny lighting bug song reference gets all thumbs?? FML
your_ma 27
What a proper mental!
Newboyz00185 0
Please dont take this the wrong way But you look better with the light off Better with the lights off Ooooooooo Ooooooooo
juicedboi 7
No life till leather, we are gonna kick some ass tonight, Hit the lights! Hit the lights! m/
your_ma 27
You're thirteen. Your opinion on what I look like is irrelevant to me kiddo..
nixter5 18
Only in Australia.
lilwaynerockz_fml 12
Hey you know what they say: you catch more flies with honey
Radix 3
Not really. Just like a lot of animals they can get stressed out. Fish get stressed when the glass is tapped. Chameleons when they are handled, etc. Maybe he kept flies and wanted them to be healthy
aleithiera 2
46- those are lyrics to a Chris Brown song. It's all over the radio.
your_ma 27
Ah so I just sounded like a twat then?
aleithiera 2
Pretty much :/
phatdaddy62 23
Your_ma, I think you're hot!
your_ma 27
Oops.
Newboyz00185 0
Oops I did it again.. I played with your heart.. Got lost in the game.. Ooh baby baby
Riya2595 15
Lol!! But did you switch off the light in the end?
Pinguini26 6
Well... Some ppl are just stupid. Not really FYL but FHL.
cheer4ever96 8
That's a bit awkward. Sorry op, hope you managed. Tho it isn't a fml
kendybendy 6
To be honest i don't see how that's really a fml
xrainbowshadowx 17
And why exactly were you stuck in a room with a guy like that?
greg84_fml 21
That is exactly what I want to know, how the hell do you get in a situation like that?
HomeAl0ne 20
A little bit of back story will help. OP was at her gynecologist, undergoing an examination. An obscure Australian law states that all such examinations must take in a room with at least one window open (to allow escape in event of a bush fire). Attracted by the smell, several large blowflies had entered the room through the window (there was a flyscreen over window, but it had been badly damaged by a ringtail possum the night before). A sub-clause in that little-known law requires the gynecologist to promptly capture any flies that come in through the open window. I've got no idea why he wanted the lights off though - that's just weird.
PrickHead 0
i was hoping for a funny ending to that long story...
lukiesmama 0
Is that for real the back story?
marinus_fml 20
Only in Australia do we have me mentals like this.
ModelTheExotic 0
Hey(:
crazychick1269 7
I don't get it..
mcerin 10
HAHA omg where were you ?!
HelloNoora1 0
in a room, with a man trying to catch flies.
FFPulley 9
Waaaaay over her head!!!
iBxChelss 3
Ummm leave?
OfficeNinja 5
and why are you "stuck" in the room? you are either in prison or can't figure out the mystery of the doorknob? even my cat can open doors to enter or leave a room...