Today, after moving into my new house, I woke up to strange sounds coming from the kitchen. I panicked and started sobbing, convinced it was either a robbery or a home invasion. Turned out it was just my cat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to noises from downstairs. I practically pissed my pants and called the cops. Turned out it was just my cat being a dickhead in the living room. FML
Today, I woke up to noises in my living room. I was scared, but I loaded my gun and snuck downstairs. I burst into the living room, yelled for the motherfucker robbing me to put his hands up, and flicked on the light. My cat stared back at me like I was a moron then calmly walked out. FML
Today, I kept hearing big *THUD* sounds across the house. The first few times, I didn't think anything of it. But after several more times, I started to suspect there was an intruder. After sneaking through the house, ready to knock out whomever was there, I found out it was my cat pushing things off the table. FML
Today, I spent an hour in my car terrified to go inside because I thought my house was being burgled. I saw rapid shadows in the light of my lounge. Eventually I plucked up the courage to creep inside with a rock to find it wasn't a robber. It was my cats, fighting in front of a toppled lamp. FML
Today, I took a late-night shower. When I got out afterwards, the bathroom door was ajar, and I could have sworn I heard the faint patter of footsteps in the kitchen. "It's probably the cat," I told myself. Then I went upstairs and saw my cat asleep on my bed. FML
Today, while trying to sleep, I heard what sounded like someone breaking into my house. I ran downstairs, only to find my cat had ripped down my blinds and was tangled up in them, thrashing around the floor like a fish. FML
Today, after my house almost got broken into last week, when I heard some noises in the kitchen I went to investigate. I saw a huge rat run across my floor, and nearly peed myself thinking it was an intruder. FML
Today, I experienced the fright of a lifetime when I woke up and heard my bedroom door opening. Fearing that there was an intruder, I picked up a bat and opened the door, ready to whack the mystery intruder. There was no one there. No one, except my cat, who apparently knows how to open doors now. FML
Today, at 2 a.m. I heard a noise coming from the living room. I thought somebody must be breaking in, so I had to save my cats. When I opened the door, all I could see was the only plant I owned, all over the room. The cats just greeted me with a friendly purr, like they were happy I was joining them in their sandbox. FML
Today, I jumped when, after being home alone for days, I suddenly saw the door handle move. Apparently, the cats weren't happy about being locked out of the kitchen and were pretty close to figuring things out. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
He was really trying out his dream job of becoming a cat burglar. It's all part of the master plan.
BBeffedmylife 28
Don't feel bad OP! I'm convinced my cat is a robber or ghost sometimes!
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Comments (46)
firstbasemaster 15
You gotta watch out for cats they wait for the right moment then maul the **** out of your face
domolovesyoshi 33
I've lived with cats my entire life and not once have I had one just randomly maul me for no reason. they've mauled me because they were scared, angry, playing (a little too rough) but they've never done it for no reason at all
spacey_blueberry 18
Why are you complaining? Be thankful it wasn't a robbery or home invasion OP...
tony1891 22
scared by a cat burglar
whatafuckup 14
It happens to the best of us
23lf 16
I think everyone panics like that in an empty house, especially a new one OP
laden_swallow09 35
Speak for yourself.
Brandi_Faith 34
I think a lot of people are startled by the new noises in a new empty house, however I'm pretty sure most don't panic and react quite like OP did.
Sakuraashita 15
So lemme get this straight... You think somebody broke in and your first reaction is to cry? Sorry, OP, but next time you'd do better to quietly investigate or call somebody, (so that if something happens to you they would know right away)... If it had been real crying could've gotten you killed.
RedPillSucks 33
Right. I hate when people act like a horror movie victim. Either call the police or someone else or get out of the house. No need to huddle in a corner, sobbing, and waiting to get stabbed, shot, or worse.
Brandi_Faith 34
That would definitely be the logical thing to do. However when fear and panic settle in, often times peoples reactions aren't logical. I think quite a few women would start to cry if they genuinely thought there was someone in the house. This doesn't mean there won't be any further action they would take, just that crying would be the first one. They may cry and then get up and lock the bedroom door and then call the police.
Shayaan 10
Don't worry, you're not the only one. Back before my cat passed away, I was young and she would start running around hitting everything at night. And I would be so scared in my room
CaroAurelia 12
Was it a female in heat? I ask this because my family and I fostered a female cat who'd had kittens and hadn't yet been fixed, and when she detected an eligible bachelor cat, she sounded like someone getting murdered.
SexyMexi21 23
Why would you cry etc? I'm sure as hell you would have gotten killed if it was real. or your cat would have at least. next grab a bat/or glock and head out!
Jjtacos 5
sounds like you shouldn't be living on your own. FYL