Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML
Today, my husband and I were talking about celebrities he finds attractive. All of these beautiful, talented, glamorous women were starting to make me feel very plain, so he attempted to console me by saying, "But I love you. You're attainable!" FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML
Today, my wife, who has a drinking problem, looked me straight in the eye as she poured herself a "water" bottle to enjoy while at work. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
Today, my crazy ex-girlfriend legally changed her last name to mine. I'm getting married in a week. FML
Today, while sitting next to me, my boyfriend sent a text to one of his "friends" saying, "I'm thinking of you." FML
Today, my boyfriend of 2 years told me he had feelings for someone else. He also told me he wanted to continue dating me until things progressed further with the other woman. FML
Today, I was insulted and harassed by my sister and her boyfriend, all because I proposed yesterday. They were angry I might get married before they did. They have known each other since primary school; I met my fiancée earlier this year. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Egao_fml 8
What the?
greenie213 23
Past wives, future wives, midwives, good wives, bad wives, big wives, tall wives, fat wives, skinny wives. The list goes on and on!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (86)
3Aboodii 16
Win for your Hubby!!
Sandman366 6
Not anymore! (Unless you're extremely tolerant of this kind of jerk.)
The_F3rris 11
He sounds like a keeper. Does he take that ego off before he goes to bed at night? It'd be a shame if it got wrinkly.
peterf1983 3
Lol. Now go make him a sandwich!
xX4n0nym0u5Xx 5
Pure genius.
erinchick1 7
WTF! That's a red flag right there that he's probably cheating on you.
chippa 24
Skeptic... They were just arguing. Good luck with your future relationships.
SamCrow 1
Confusing......
kitkattgirl 2
Yeah, insults like that are common in a marriage. Arguments bring out the worst in spouses. Since we don't know who's at fault for the argument or what OP said that was probably just as terrible, it's difficult to put all the blame on him. That was very clever and funny, however.
RAVENxD1234 3
That sucks!
sillymoony 0
He's like taking you for granted. You don't deserve him.