Today, I was getting ready for my first date with a boy I really like when my dad insisted on meeting him. My dad is super protective and a cop. He cleaned his gun in front of my date and made it clear he had to be careful with me. My date started to cry when we got to the car. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was supposed to be going on my first date with a guy I really liked. He never showed up. I just found out my dad was outside washing the car when my date showed up. He told him he didn't have a daughter and to never show up on his driveway again. FML
Today, I was going on my first date. I was planning my outfit with my mom when my dad offered his advice. “That boy won’t care what outfit you’re wearing, just make sure you wear sexy underwear and carry a condom, guaranteed first date success. That’s how me and your mom got married, you know?” FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up to take me on a date. Just as we were about to drive away, my dad ran out of the house in his underwear and started yelling that he'd kill my boyfriend if I wasn't back home within the hour. FML
Today, I went on a first date with a guy I really like. He brought up that there was a person staring at us from a nearby table. That person was my mom. FML
Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML
Today, my boyfriend drove me back home. My dad was sitting on the porch in his underwear, with his shotgun in his lap. He stroked the gun, looked my boyfriend dead in the eyes, and slowly shook his head. Now my boyfriend refuses to see me for his own safety. FML
Today, I had a first date with a guy I met online. And his mom. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Today, I went on my very first date. We went out to eat dinner and everything went great! Afterwards, I went to drop him back off at his house. I backed out of his driveway and got stuck in a ditch. His dad had to come out and tow me out. So that's how I met my boyfriend's parents. FML
Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
shan789mudge 0
aww haha poor guy! =P
happy_me 0
awww poor guy :( fhl i hope you dont judge him for that only. I'd be ******** my pants too
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (407)
lovely997 0
TWILIGHT minus the crying at the car part PS/ i can't stand cops who act like that
berryacreamer 0
What a wimp. Find another boy who's got a backbone. My first girlfriends father tried that on me. I just asked him if he needed any help, and he realized I wasn't intimidated in the least. I got along great with her father after that.
hellomynameis_ 0
Your dad is my hero.
ag1123 0
Wow im srry but that sad my ex girlfriends dad is a Lt.Col in the Army and he was cleaning his gun and knife when i was over and i just pulled out my knife and showed it to him
lologirl419 0
Wow, that's like that country song... My dad says he's gonna do that, too, but I don't believe him. Don't think less of the guy cause of that, though. Your dad probably really scared him... I'd be scared too. XDXD
Nicolai_Tansy 0
thats going to be my daddy when i turn 16 and am allowed to date. cept my daddy's not a cop, he owns a gun shop. and he'll be cleaning the shotgun. and just cuz her date cried doesnt mean that he's a pussy. you guys who implied that are rude ignorant heartless douche bags.
pulp_DiCTiON 0
Awwww.. he shoulden't have cried.. pusssss move right there... but for some reason I find this kind of endearing, an overprotective father who would probably kill a guy for breaking his little girls heart. It's cute/sweet to me in a way... I thought the same thing in twilight.. I hope my Hubby does this to the potential dickheads if we have a Daughter, Man em up a little bit & let em know your daughter isn't to be fcked with.. Ur LUCKY to have a father who would protect you like that!
trustno1fox 0
#309- Yeh he is a big pussy. If you were a dude you would know how hard it is for a dude to cry. Physically I mean.
ya_chuzhoi 0
Your "boyfriend" sounds like a big sissy, and you should dump him immediately if you haven't already. If I were in his position, I probably would have been chatting with your dad about guns, rather than bawling my eyes out like an emasculated, dysgenic waste of carbon. Real men are at least not afraid of guns, if they don't already own them or at least go shooting every now and then. It sounds like he needs to "Harden The **** Up."
Common_Sense 0
This sounds so fake...