Today, my mom bought me pepper spray in case anyone tried to "mess" with me. I put it in my purse. Later, a guy snatched my purse before I even had the chance to take out the pepper spray. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got mugged. But luckily I had on my keyring the pepper spray that my husband had insisted I keep with me. Unlucky for me, my husband's co-worker, who borrowed my keys, emptied my pepper by spraying it on a brick wall one day when he was bored. FML
Today, to protect me from the 'bad people' out there, my mom bought some pepper spray. While trying to test it, I accidentally sprayed myself in the eyes. Now, every person I meet asks me what I've been crying about. FML
Today, after lunch with my frail, disabled, 87-year-old father, I reached into my purse for lipstick. I didn't recognize the cute cylinder I pulled out, but thinking it was a flashlight, I pressed the little button, spraying my dad and myself in the face with pepper spray. FML
Today, I saw a toddler bolt in a parking lot. Since he was running towards the road behind me, I scooped him up to hand off to his mother. She shrieked, snatched him from my hands, and sprayed me with mace. While I was writhing in pain, some punk kid lifted my wallet and phone. FML
Today, my roommate showed me that her pepper spray had expired, so I decided to test it on myself. It worked. FML
Today, while on the bus, I took out my breath spray. The elderly lady beside me thought it was pepper spray. She panicked and started screaming, which culminated in the man near her punching me in the jaw. FML
Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML
Today, I went to eat out. When I sat down, I realized I forgot my straw. I took my purse with me, not wanting it to get stolen. Someone stole my food instead. FML
Today, while on vacation with my family, my mother told me to put my phone in her purse, so it wouldn't get stolen. Someone stole her purse. FML
Today, the only parking spot available at the supermarket had some shopping carts in it, so I got out of my car and moved them. As soon as I finished, a lady stole the spot. When I confronted her, she maced me with pepper spray and walked off. FML
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Top comments
cudi504 4
Next time hold it at eye level at all times
cudi504 4
Thanks iv been working out
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Comments (120)
afulks78 11
Awe :(
georgie_sd 5
Damn, you sure know how to use a pepper spray ha !
megsawesome 0
And that's what I call irony.
docscientist 10
No!
_Full_of_excuses 5
Sounds like your mom knew what was coming.
Urbanchiller 0
It's awkward how you got mugged the same day you recieved the pepper spray. "Having a gun increases your chance to get shot". "Having a pepper spray increases your chance to get mugged?"
BrotherTheo 31
On the + side, you're unharmed. They didn't bash your head in or something before taking your purse. Always a good thing eh?
UrCapsLockOn 12
i always wandered if i can use pepper spray on food to make it taste better ..
Dcm210 19
put a anti-rape device in your pussy,cut his dick off.
KittahMonster 20
Don't put it in your purse. that's stupid. do what I did, get pepper spray with a key chain ring on it and take Velcro and wrap it around just above your upper part of your calf. if your not wearing tight pants no one will see it, and you can reach down and grab the pepper spray bottle and pull it right off quick. if you are wearing a jacket, don't put it on your calf, put it instead somewhere inside your jacket, again with Velcro so you can quickly pull it right off to use. Ez ~~Kittah
adrayy 4
Unfortunately, if you live in a hot or humid climate such as Arizona, California, Maryland, Florida, etc. you probably won't be wearing long pants or a jacket. Clip it to your keys and carry your keys on your person. You won't have to waste time fumbling around with the Velcro or reattaching it every single time you go out.
Cmdr_Shepard 17
That was a really dumb place to put your pepper spray. How are you gonna stop a guy stealing your purse?! Well at least the mugger has a new spice for his meals because pepper spray is a food product, essentially (THANK YOU BASED FOX NEWS). Also how did it take over 90 comments for someone to even make a reference to the chick from Fox News calling pepper spray a food product, essentially?! FYL.com, I am disappoint.