Today, I got a call from the local police station. Apparently, my idiot son and his equally dumb girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to have sex in the car at a park in broad daylight. They assumed no one would be there due to the quarantine. They were wrong. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to pick my parents up from jail. They thought it would be okay to have sex behind a bush. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got busted by a cop for having sex in his car. When the cop sent us on our way, we went home and the garage was open, so we called the cops thinking someone was in the home. No one was in the house, and we got the same cop. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I got busted by the cops having sex in a dark parking lot near the beach. As if that wasn't bad enough, as I was trying to talk my way out of a ticket, one of the cops peeks into the car window and I hear my girlfriend awkwardly giggle and say, "Hi daddy." FML
Today, my normally very unadventurous girlfriend decided she wanted to have public sex. We were naked in the back of her car when she saw someone in the distance, had a panic attack, and started screaming uncontrollably. I got arrested because a cop heard the screams and thought I was attacking her. FML
Today, I had to retrieve my son from the police station because him and his girlfriend decided a blowjob in the back row of the cinema was a good idea when they have night vision cameras in there and security guards and a very high definition picture printer for evidence. FML
Today, I had to arrest my own boyfriend for having sex in public. FML
Today, my parents overheard me having sex with my girlfriend. They thought it would be funny to barge in with nothing but underwear on. This has happened twice now. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car and we got caught. He’s being detained because I’m underage. My parents were called and are on their way. I had told them I was studying for final exams with a classmate. I feel like I’m next in line on death row. FML
Today, a police officer caught my girlfriend and me having sex. The officer was my dad, and we were butt naked in his new Ford Expedition. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got busted having public sex. In desperation, I promised the officer he could fuck me if he let us go. Now I've got an extra charge and probably an ex-boyfriend. FML
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Top comments
RichardPencil 32
Were they arrested for public lewdness or violating social distance? I mean, in the act, their social distance goes negative.😂
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Please tell me these morons were at least using protection. The last thing they need is a baby. And stupid breeds stupid.
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Comments (5)
RichardPencil 32
Were they arrested for public lewdness or violating social distance? I mean, in the act, their social distance goes negative.😂
GamerChickxoxo 16
My friends got caught by the principle of their highschool, i tossed them, the spare key to my apartment and said they could shag on the spare mattress rather than getting a criminal record.
sickerthanyou 13
Isn’t it fun to have to be a register sex offender? Lol
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Please tell me these morons were at least using protection. The last thing they need is a baby. And stupid breeds stupid.