Today, I woke up at three in the morning when two cops busted in the door to my apartment and a frantic voice on my cellphone saying "Sir? Sir? Are you all right? Sir?" Turns out I had been having a nightmare and dreamed I called 911. I actually did. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I put my headphones on and laid down to relax to some music. I fell asleep, and woke up later to a police officer busting into my house. My neighbor had been knocking on my door, then looked through my window and saw me on my couch, and was convinced I'd died. FML
Today, I slipped as I was about to take a shower, knocking myself out cold. I woke up to someone banging on my door. It was a cop checking to see if I was okay. When I asked how he knew to come, he said he was notified by "a male neighbor who called anonymously." I guess I have a peeping Tom. FML
Today, at the gas station I work a lady called wanting to know the "password" and if I was okay. Thinking it was a prank I hung up. A couple of minutes later she called back, this time asking if I could see the cops outside and telling me I'd be alright. I saw four of 'em. I'd hit the silent alarm by accident. FML
Today, I was woken up at 2 in the morning by my phone ringing. As I groggily reached for it I managed to knock my fan onto my head, leaving a grate-shaped bruise. The best part? My phone wasn't ringing, I dreamed myself awake. FML
Today, I woke up in a panic to what sounded like a plane about to crash into my house. I was so scared, I peed myself and passed out. It was just my cell phone vibrating under my pillow. FML
Today, after a long day at work, I fell asleep in my living room. When I woke up, I saw a man leaving my bedroom wearing my pajamas, and I started screaming as he casually left. The cops came and apparently he's mentally ill. He truly believed it was his house. FML
Today, my grandfather showed up at my house in a panic. He rushed over, with a gun, because I wasn't answering his texts and he thought something had happened to me. I was asleep. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML
Today, I was house-sitting for my friend. He was late to return and I ended up falling asleep on the couch and having a dream where I violently shat myself and suddenly developed a six-pack. When I woke up, I found the dream was half true. FML
Today, I was woken up by my elderly neighbor banging on my door at 2am. She needed "urgent" assistance as she had forgotten how to turn her TV off. I'd just fallen asleep. FML
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Top comments
Jcsati8 0
What did you tell them when they came? "i called 911 in my sleep, sorry dudes" you must have sounded real believeable!
gabbyh 0
BAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAAA omg. sorry. I've done something like that before. Except I overdosed and hallucinated that I called 911 but I really didn't.
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Comments (109)
PKYAZ 0
haha funny lol I hope that wont happen to me lol
Mieu 0
Lmfao, that's gotta suck. xD;; Hopefully things got cleared up.
BensMusicLife 0
i've actually done that twice! lol
myster1ous 0
LOL hectic.
Vehicle 1
The CRAZY things we do in our sleep! :-O
NurseOneDay 0
Not true. When you dial 911 from a cell phone, emergency services cannot get a fix on your location. That's why they always ask for your address.
xenomorph 0
Actually, they can. If you set your location privacy to "on" or "E911 only," they determine your location (I believe by relative signal strengths and/or ping times).
veliki 0
You, sir, are an genius.
MadeOfAwesome 1
Ouch, I hope they believed you
oh_mygawd 0
LMFAO! That sucks dude!
I_iz_epic 0
lol! It's almost like you never woke up ;) @89: Words cannot express the irony in your comment.