Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I accidentally farted while on my flight home. It was silent but so deadly that several people were visibly distressed. The overweight guy sitting next to me got a bunch of dirty glares. I was too ashamed to own up to it. FML
Today, I screamed at a taxi driver to not run over a hedgehog. He got a fright and ended up pulling over. I hopped out and ran to the middle of the road to pick up the hedgehog and leave him on the grass by the path. As I got closer and went to pick up said hedgehog, I realised it was a pinecone. FML
Today, during a long flight, I tried to discreetly pass gas. Instead, I misjudged the pressure and ended up making a loud noise that everyone around me seemingly heard. To make matters worse, the flight attendant asked if everything was OK. Now I’m probably remembered as "Farts on a plane." FML
Today, I was sitting next to a lady on an airplane who was very overweight. She fell asleep on me, and violently bled from her nose upon take off and landing. FML
Today, I was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls down her pants, and sits on my lap. Needless to say she didn't even notice I was there until I hyperventilated. FML
Today, I was asleep on a plane. I woke up after feeling the plane jolt and I screamed at the top of my lungs. The little girl next to me told me I was a sissy. Everyone around us laughed. FML
Today, I traveled by plane for the first time. Once in the air, I was absolutely terrorized by the whole experience. Luckily, they had free booze on board, so I necked some to steady my nerves. Unfortunately, the vodka mixed with air turbulence made me spurt some vomit into my lap. FML
Today, I was boarding a plane and a woman's bag started to fall. In the spur of the moment I thrust my arm up to catch it. I didn't catch the bag, but I did catch her boob. I had to sit next to her for the rest of the flight. FML
Today, I was supposed to fly home for my dad's funeral, but the woman in the seat next to me was so obese, her bulging flesh left absolutely no way for me to sit in my seat. I complained to the stewardess, who then forced me to leave the plane just for raising my voice in frustration. FML
Today, on a train, I nearly choked while sleeping with my mouth wide open. The little old lady sitting opposite me was entertaining herself by throwing little pieces of balled-up tin foil into my mouth. FML
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Top comments
MissMess 12
That has to be the weirdest thing to have a phobia of!
BurningGrannies 16
I can't sleep now that I know there are people who don't report hedgehogs on planes.
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Comments (197)
TheyCallMeDamien 18
But they're so cute! But you should've ratted on her if you were that afraid. Hell she could smuggling illegal animals for all you know. And it would force the airlines to fire the person that let that slide because obviously there is a breach in security either because of incompetence or deliberate action both of which are unacceptable.
beclaurela 18
Hedgehogs are the cutest. D:
insaneDONUTZ 15
how csn you be afraid of Sonic and his friends?!
kalbrek009 20
I can't imagine being fearful of one of the least dangerous animals on the planet....to me, that would be like being fearful of oxygen...just saying you need to spend some time with the little critters & you'll see there's nothing to be fearful of
Deviety 5
What are the utter chances of the exact thing you have a phobia of, landing in the seat RIGHT next to you on a plane? That ONE lady, on that ONE flight, had to have the ONE thing you are deathly afraid of? Worst luck ever? ;)
flavasava73 5
I realise it was probably not an international flight, but doesn't the US have sone sort of quarantine border control? Wouldn't taking an animal on a plane like that breach some sort of protocols? Here in Australia, we have some of the toughest, if not the toughest, quarantine border controls. For international flights, No fruit, no food, no untreated wood, not even soil in the soles of your shoes is allowed to cross our border. National flights still have limitations though somewhat less on food. I'm pretty sure a hedgehog is ... About 5 th of the list.
princess93_fml 2
The food? It's highly unlikely shed have a live hedgehog in a container right?
Levvy 22
Yes, because carrying boxes of dead hedgehogs around, on the other hand, makes perfect sense.
Levvy 22
Most "archaic weird law" lists like this are either taken out of context or outright fabrications. The mind also boggles at how many people don't know what the word "molest" means and freak out any time they see it used in a context like this.
Notyours007 9
The odds that someone you sit next to on the plane has a hedge hog maybe a million to one, the odds that it happens to someone who has a phobia of hedge hogs a billion to one.
lllgggccc 1
I take it prevarication is your strong point!