Today, I had to hide the entire drawer of kitchen knives under my bed just to keep my mother from stabbing her cheating boyfriend, and slashing his tires. This happens more often than I'd like to admit. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML
Today, I was helping tidy up after my girlfriend's flat warming. I went to put a sharp kitchen knife in the sink while she was washing dishes, and stabbed her in the finger instead. FML
Today, I was curious as to whether or not my mom was off of her medication. When I asked her, she pulled a knife on me. Looks like I got my answer. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend keeps a sword under the bed, a proper sharp 'knight on horseback' sword instead of the typical baseball bat for burglars, I found this out after I was groping under there for a dropped earring and cut one of my fingers down to the bone. FML
Today, I caught my ex trying to slash my car tires with a knife. She actually had the balls to claim she was testing my tire pressure, before power-walking off into the distance like nothing had happened. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to a figure holding a knife above me. After I screamed in terror, the figure burst into laughter. It was my mom. She did this as payback for me not washing the dishes last night after making food. FML
Today, I realized my paranoia is really bad when I saw my coworker holding a knife and immediately began thinking of ways to keep him from stabbing me. I work in a restaurant kitchen. FML
Today, while trying to quietly sneak a midnight snack with my girlfriend, I was slowly opening the pantry door so I wouldn't wake my mother. My girlfriend came and swung open the door onto my foot, taking the top layer of skin with it. FML
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML
Today, I discovered a drawer full of chocolates, cookies and baked goods in my house. When I asked my sister what the drawer was, she told me that my mom thought it would be a good idea to hide the fattening foods from me. My entire family had known about the food drawer, except me. FML
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Top comments
aperron96 18
I think it's time to move out, or kick her out. I know she's your mom but that's just psychotic
paperroll880 16
Sounds like you're the mother in this relationship.
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Comments (53)
PhoenixChick 26
Please take care of yourself. Look for counseling options for both of you, have a support network, find someone you can trust with what's going on and ask them to be a lifeline. Keep your phone charged and nearby at all times. That's an awful situation to be in, and a dangerous personality to live with.
lightningclicks 24
By hiding the knives, you're not fixing the problem. It's a good temporary solution, but consider trying something like anger management classes for her or a councillor that will help your mother long-term.
skylerthecloud 12
she's stabbed someone before?
tiredofwaiting 25
You should not have to supervise your mother. She should just dump him.
pmugtserrof 10
And then she'll find the knives under your bed and yell at you for cutting yourself.
ekalfhsa 2
Very few FML posts make me genuinely sad. But OP, your situation is so terrible. If you feel that you or someone is in danger, get out and call the police. If there is someone at school you can talk to, please please do. Your mum needs help, and you need a safe environment.
Witchylady 18
And don't forget gardening tools. They too can be sharp. Sounds like a volatile situation. And if your mom is on a mission to stab her boyfriend at some point she is going to do it why her you hide the knives or not. What a sad situation to live in. I hope you have somewhere else you can go to. Good luck.
mthurston 14
Shit, I'd let her do it
HooyahNavy 10
Crazy house anyone?
phreaker913 21
maybe you should stop hiding them? js