Today, I reached down to pet an elderly man's dog. It jumped up and utterly mauled my face, drawing blood. As I gasped in shock and pain, the man said, "Careful, he likes to scratch." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on the couch, about to make out with the guy I've been dating. As soon as our lips touched, my overprotective dog ran up and bit him. He bled. FML
Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML
Today, I was lying in bed with my cat. I must have looked at him the wrong way or something, because he hissed and savagely clawed at my face without warning. FML
Today, I laughed at my grandma's chihuahua poodle mix, as it barked at me entering the house. "What are you going to do, nibble me to death?" is apparently enough to make it jump and bite me. I needed five stitches. FML
Today, I saw a dog trying to attack a man. I have experience working with aggressive dogs, so I pulled the dog off him and got it under control. The man punched me in the face for not having my dog on a leash. It wasn't my dog. I don't even own a dog. FML
Today, I entered my neighbors’ yard around a shorter corner than usual. Their old dog is getting a bit slow, but unfortunately only in her head: By the time she recognized me as harmless, she had already run up and bitten me. FML
Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML
Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML
Today, my medium-sized poxer dog was sitting on my lap. He shook his head, managing to slap me in the face with his ears three times. FML
Today, my neighbor's dog came to visit and I tried to bring him back home like I usually do. Only this time, when I grabbed the dog's collar, they zapped him! And it zapped me! My teeth still hurt! FML
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Top comments
skippydoda 32
Did you ask first before you pet? If you did, then FYL. If you didn't, then YDI. Always ask before you pet a stranger animal.
jpsullivan 36
You never pet someone's dog without their permission. They could be a rescue dog who doesn't like strangers, easily excitable, or they could be a dog for disabilities. I'm sorry you got attacked and the guy seemed uncaring but dude ydi
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Comments (74)
popemichael 9
YDI. What in the hell possessed you to touch a stranger's dog without permission?
Serina Marsh 3
Who raised you? Clearly nobody or they would have tought you 2 things. Always ask before petting someone's dog, and consent. You dont scare a dog then get mad when they jump and defend themselves. You get the dogs attention, let them sniff you, then read their body language and figure out if they are letting you pet them or not. Ffs people. CONSENT ISNT JUST FOR SEX! DO NOT TOUCH ANY LIVING THING WITHOUT PERMISSION! DO MOT TOUCH OTHER PEOPLE'S PROPERTY WITHOUT PERMISSION!! CONSENT! CONSENT! CONSENT! Each of you jerks would say "calm down its 'just'" NO! If someone came up and touched you without your permission you would wig out though. Cuz most of you are hypocrites.