Today, I received a call offering me a job with the census bureau. I applied for this job 6 months ago while I was still fighting tooth and nail to stay where I was. Since I didn't get the job, I was evicted from my apartment, got on public assistance, and moved from North Carolina to Florida with my mother. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I moved back home after unsuccessfully trying to find work in Florida, despite living there for nine months. About 45 minutes into my 18-hour drive home, a TV station called me to offer me a job interview. I applied for that job over three months ago. FML
Today, I was dismissed from my job at an unemployment agency. In order to receive financial support from the government I need to be cooperating with a job service provider. They paired me up with the same place I was just fired from. FML
Today, after being jobless for 2 years, I got a call back for an interview. I was ecstatic until I saw the date. It's the same day I leave for a weeklong, nonrefundable vacation. I applied for the job 6 weeks ago, and since not hearing anything bought the vacation 2 weeks ago. FML
Today, after finally getting a job offer after months of unemployment, I found out that the person who was going to hire me got fired. Which means I'm not getting the job. FML
Today, I got a call from the only company that asked me to come in for an interview of the many applications I submitted. I answered it even though I was at my current job. My boss heard and chewed me out. The call was to cancel the interview since the position was filled. FML
Today, after quitting my job to take a very attractive position with a competitor, I was told the position was no longer being offered. I'm now on my way to file for unemployment. FML
Today, I got offered an interview for a job after months of unemployment. It's a three-month contract, three hours away from where we live. My boyfriend's reaction was to tell me to move out and take our hamster with me. FML
Today, after 3 years of unemployment and 6 months of hard studying, I found out I hadn't actually registered myself for the public service exam that will happen later this month and could finally get me a job. FML
Today, and for the past 3 years since I first started looking for work, my mother has once again cussed me out and called me "ungrateful" because I tried to get a job. She won't let me get my ID, and she will only apply to jobs around our tiny town that she "feels like doing." We're about to lose our home. FML
Today, I received an e-mail from the Unemployment Department saying they had a job referral for me. After excitedly reading the description, I realised it was the job I'd just been fired from (at a much higher pay). If I don't go through the application process, I will be denied my unemployment. FML
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Top comments
AmaSoma 0
Screw those guys. People who wait forever to inform you about a job like that are sonsofbitches.
Starfire22 5
the irony of it all! well that sucks did you decide to take the job?
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Comments (63)
jadeddream 0
Um, so take the job and move back?
Caayouteepie 0
Thats not as easy as it sounds. I mean hed need to start working first and if he didnt have money to stay in the first place, I doubt he can afford to go back now.
duales 0
if he really wanted it he could do it. Im 3000 in debt for moving and taking the job i wanted. it sucks, im struggling, but i know i love my job and i will eventually rebound.
sportsnut 0
completely agree, this is just a "damn, now i have to move again"
Saiiyko 0
census isnt a permanant job. so moving back would be pointless.
AmaSoma 0
Screw those guys. People who wait forever to inform you about a job like that are sonsofbitches.
perdix 31
Kudos to you for a correct pluralization of son-of-a-bitch! Someone asked me this interesting question: how do we know it's sons-of-bitches (multiple sons of multiple bitches) and not sons-of-a-bitch (multiple sons of a single bitch)?
AmaSoma 0
Haha, thanks. And I guess that answer does hinge on whether there are multiple rather than singular bitches. I defer to the former if I can't attach a name to the epithet.
Dcvictorious 0
What's going on, where are the real ****** lives!!!! You're still going aren't you FFS! How about you stop whining and go back, pretty sure you could afford to now. Jesus...
Dcvictorious 0
She's had 6 months! Living with her mother, pretty sure she'd have money, have some common sense, I think you should try thinking with your one braincell dipshit.
renaet 0
I suspect you're about 14 or 15 and have yet to work. GTFO until you get a real job, your own living arrangements and then let us know if you find it easy to move from place to place without paychecks.
Dcvictorious 0
Nah I work already thanks. I live in England where you pay monthly, I've already explained twice but my comments have been taken down- She's had six months, she has money, she has a job, pretty sure she can move back, end of story. You can "suspect" I'm 14 or 15 and have yet to work but I'm afraid you'd be wrong, only in America aye?
Dcvictorious 0
LOL! I'm afraid that I'm not taking any BS from some 17yr old, You think you can talk about Jobs and living arangements- Unless you're actually some 40 yr old internet perv- probs why you'd like to assume I'm 14.
Bumlove89 0
Having 6 months does not mean that the OP has money. It is highly possible that she's still unemployed which would explain why she is living with her mother. And as #4 has stated, how is she suppose to move back if she has no money?
Dcvictorious 0
1. I don't know or care how the American systemon housing works. But in England, if I were to get a job I could move to an apartment or something and pay monthly therefore ending the whole paycheck problem. 2. I would assume she does have a job but if not- 2 options- loan from mother, loan from bank to tide her over whilst she sorts it out. I really don't see why you people make out like there is never a way, it's not hard if you think about it.
totallyfuckd13 0
1. I don't know or care how the American systemon housing works exactly. so maybe you should stop talking trash about a situation you don't actually know everything about. you don't even live in america so stop acting like you know everything. oh, and learn to spell
Dcvictorious 0
It's called typos not knowing how to spell. I have an A Level in English so yeah, p.s STFU. "stop talking trash about a situation you don't actually know everything about. you don't even live in america so stop acting like you know everything." Trash? I posted a comment and I got called out, now you're trying to gang up on me and yet you know I'm talking sense so you have no arguement. Oh and yeah-your grasp of Grammar is obviously far superior to mine, "don't actually know everything about" Learn to stop being an arrogant ass.
Bumlove89 0
You got called out because you obviously have no idea what you're talking about. Seriously, just shut up.
Dcvictorious 0
Yes no idea...because I don't know the housing system, because, the whole, getting a loan thing obviously solves nothing.
DameGreyWulf 1
The getting a loan thing usually bites you in the ass and/or takes forever to pay back, or too long in which case you get evicted like the OP did, leaving the banks out a bunch of money, which is kind of why the economy is shit at the moment.
spiderman0606 0
Most banks wouldnt even accept her loan request in this situation. Basically, first you have to prove you don't actually need the loan before you are granted that loan. If not, you need a co-signer, and maybe she doesn't even have someone who can do that for her. Her next probable option would be a credit card, and get interest so far up her ass, she'd be ****** for life. (Not like her life isn't already ****** up as it is.)
Dcvictorious 0
48. You're a bellend who knows nothing about anything, FYL.
AsAlwaysAndrew 0
You actually need to be removed from the gene pool.
hiphopchick7 1
yeah well this isn't England, this is America fyi
xenomorph 0
I hate when that happens.
manman523 0
At least you got the job lol
Starfire22 5
the irony of it all! well that sucks did you decide to take the job?
perdix 31
You should get your damn $200 portfolio back from them and head out to your local Best Buy. Do not include your Nobel Prize in Physics on your resume and lie freely and outrageously on the psych evaluation. And lock up your Nyquil and Jaegermeister the day before your interview.
Starfire22 5
Nice way to sum everything up lmao
danthehuman 29
Whoa, perdix! :O
Emmeleia 8
oi Dcvictorious it doesnt state op managed to get another job not likes it easy maybe if it was they wouldnt have had to move -.- therefore op probably still doesnt have any money to move back not unless you are gonna offer seeing as your so high and mighty about having a job?
Dcvictorious 0
High and mighty,I got called out so I corrected, I didn't go,"Hey OP guess what I have a job, har de har ******* har" It doesn't need to state it, it's common sense, the FML isn't as much of a FML if she says she has another job now is it?
Starfire22 5
Sorry dude your dealing with us Americans, one tiny mistake and they'll jump all over you! but no worries don't take it personally some of us understand where your coming from
theblueone4 0
that's the government there for you... i'm sorry. well, if you still want the job--i'm sure you can work something out hopefully. if not, screw them. you'll find other opportunities.
spiderman0606 0
but... she wont. this is A RECESSION -dunn duunnn duuuuhhhnnnnn-
FarSide 23
YDI for trusting and having faith in your government.