Today, while my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch, he looked down at my chest and said, "I can't wait for the day that these produce milk." We've only been dating a few months, and I have no intention of lactating anytime soon. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend whilst straddled on top of him. He started to undo my bra. I was fine with this but he stopped kissing me and looked at me with a slight smile. He then said, "I know this is going to kill the mood... but I feel like I could milk your boobs right now" FML
Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML
Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML
Today, when done feeding my newborn, I stated to my husband that I'm a cow. He said, in a sincere tone, "Oh, baby, you'll lose the weight soon." I meant cow because I'm producing so much milk. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with a clogged milk gland. I am not, nor have ever been, pregnant and therefore have also never breastfed. This condition is caused by my boyfriend's over-active urge to suck on my nipples. I'm in horrible pain, and he won't stop laughing. FML
Today, my husband admitted to me that he has a mental block about touching my boobs, because he's afraid that breast milk is going to spurt out at him. I had my son 5 months ago and I don't breast feed. FML
Today, I am six months pregnant and have been lactating. When I noticed this and pointed it out to my husband, I jokingly stated that I felt like a cow. He then replied. "Oh, you're not a cow. At most you're just a fat pig." He still has no clue why I'm upset. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I like it when he moans while we're having sex. Unfortunately, he interpreted that as "milk it". The sound is so obnoxious, it's starting to ruin the sex. FML
Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML
Today, my husband and I were having sex for the first time since I had our son. As I was riding him in a heated passion, he grabbed my breasts. Milk literally shot out onto his face. Mood totally ruined. FML
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Top comments
darkmis1 18
woooooow! he's in a bit of a hurry...
MiniatureMayhem 0
Somebody's hungry!
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Comments (65)
darkmis1 18
woooooow! he's in a bit of a hurry...
randomdude1234 0
Op is obviously flat chested and he wants them to swell up with milk so they won't be A- cups anymore
vonne 0
totally agree too early don't ya think...I'd be careful if I were u.
DarksideDoll 31
To be fair, he could have no yearning for kids, it could just be his little fetish. Unfortunately for him, if that's the case, it's a package deal.
cuzirock132 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Thats really embarrasing. I would've slapped him. But that's just me.
B4SK3TB4IL 0
he also looked at her hands and said I can't wait 4 these 2 make me a damn sammich
alexgisforme3 0
WTF LOL
IAmTheCamel 0
that's not weird lol
MicMic_fml 7
Cuz that'd mean they can save up on milk money..
justmyluck1212 0
um wtf ew is that supposed to be sexy?
NamesIncognita 15
some guys find it sexy...and I hate it
YDIBITCHES 0
Sixth
moonlit_manga 0
wow. he's in a hurry and abit nasty.....lol wow. AWK-waaaarrrrrddddd fyl
doubleAbattery 0
Um, well, I..uh. I have no idea what to say to that. That's really weird. Yeah.
MiniatureMayhem 0
Somebody's hungry!
urlifemaysuk 0
two syllables KIN-KY lmao but really that's disgusting kinda idc really it's a whatever situation but I'm a guy why would anyone want he's girlfrieds boobs to... you know what just no....