Today, two guys robbed me. As I wrestled them on the ground, my best friend just stood next to all this, telling me to give them the money already, or we'd be late for school. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Crusin' for a bruisin'
Today, my friend was waiting outside the store while I bought a newspaper. Through the window, I saw two guys getting physical with him, so I went outside and they took off. I muttered, "Yeah, I thought so." They then turned around and beat the crap out of us. FML
Great timing
Today, I got mugged. As the guys who took my purse were about to walk away, my cellphone rang in my pocket. FML
What a tool
Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend, when a guy pulled a knife and told us to hand over our money. My boyfriend blurted "I don't have shit, dude! She has tons of cash!" The moment the mugger turned to me, my boyfriend ran away at top speed. FML
Cash grab
Today, I spotted one of my friends using the ATM outside our school's university center. I crept up behind him, grabbed his shoulders abruptly, and shouted in my best deep man-voice, "Give me all your money!" Turned out to be a poor, unsuspecting freshman. He gave me his money. FML
Today, I was robbed while recovering from a robbery. FML
Caught in 4K
Today, I was robbed while working overnight at the gas station. They demanded I give them all the cash in the register. Seeing they were armed, I was reduced to tears and complied. They mocked me and took a video with their cellphone. When I told my boss, he promptly fired me for not “fighting back.” FML
Today, I was walking through a rough part of town, when a woman screamed that I'd stolen her bag. I was tackled to the ground by a large guy, who then gave my bag to her. FML
Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML
Captain Badass
Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
Today, I walked to my local McDonald's. I spent the last 7 dollars I had on my meal. As I began to walk back to my dorm, I was mugged. I explained to them I had no money, so they stole my food. FML
Top comments
alycion 39
Two attackers, two potential victims, but they chose just you. And your friend isn’t helping, running, or doing anything but saying give up the money. If they never touched your friend, I’d seriously wonder if he’s in on it.
RichardPencil 32
Yeah, forget about all that grab-ass and get to school!
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Comments (8)
RichardPencil 32
Yeah, forget about all that grab-ass and get to school!
alycion 39
Two attackers, two potential victims, but they chose just you. And your friend isn’t helping, running, or doing anything but saying give up the money. If they never touched your friend, I’d seriously wonder if he’s in on it.
RichardPencil 32
It’s too bad you don’t live in a country where the people have the freedom to bear arms. If you did, the robbers would have robbed you at gunpoint and had your money in 10 seconds. No muss, no fuss. Your clothes stay clean and you get to school on time. (Cue up Lee Greenwood.)
Akitakat 31
Sounds more like... no friends & 3 thieves.
bitlol 4
Sounds like my friend would do something like that...
Trinity Fenwick 7
time for a new friend
tounces7 28
Did your friend know how much money you were carrying beforehand?
WeirdUS 30
Even professionals will tell you if they have a weapon it's beter to give up your wallet than risk your life.