Today, none of my 500 Facebook friends responded to my status about "Who wants to hang out during summer holidays?" I created an imaginary person on a different account to respond and ask me to hang out with him. I had a conversation on my status, with myself. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, to give the illusion that I have friends, I wrote an outrageous status on Facebook, and then pretended it was the result of a friend hacking my page, all in the hope that it would get comments, likes, or at least some attention. Nothing happened. FML
Today, I hung out with a friend who has been too busy to hang out with me in a few months. I decided to make the day super special with fun plans and spent a lot of money doing so. When I got home, her Facebook status said, "Pointless day, gone to bed." FML
Today, I received a message on Facebook from a guy I've liked for a year. He asked me if I wanted to hang out, so I said yes. When I walked out to his car later on, he gave me a really confused look. Apparently I was on my brother's Facebook, and he'd never logged out. FML
Today, my friends created a fake Facebook profile of a girl, and asked me to be in a relationship. Even my friends think I can't get a real girlfriend, and need a fake one to feel better. FML
Today, I purposely went offline on Facebook chat, just so people would think I actually have a life. FML
Today, someone reckoned that I would never be in a relationship. So I made up this whole story about some made up guy named 'Nick' and posted stuff on my Facebook and Myspace that I'm dating him. Now all my friends want to meet him. FML
Today, I wasn't able to reply to Facebook chat message immediately, so my friends planned a holiday and bought flights without me. FML
Today, I updated my Facebook status to, "Party at my house this Friday. Like my status if you want to come." After about 3 hours I checked back to discover that the only person who'd liked my status was my grandma. FML
Today, I felt left out by the fact that all my friends are getting married or have great relationships, and my boyfriend won't commit. I made a Facebook up and pretended to talk with this really cute guy I made up. Today, I found out that my boyfriend is gay when he started hitting on my made-up Facebook guy. FML
Today, I asked out my best friend via facebook graffiti. He then accidentally wrote his rejection as his status instead of on my wall. More people liked his status than the number of friends I have on facebook. FML
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Top comments
Bryan_Z 0
^Did you create another account here to comment on your FML? :p (never mind 3 others responded and ruined it XD)
Endymion_fml 0
Facebook friends are not actual friends.
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Comments (241)
addictedjane 0
You can't see everyone's status update anymore...also, nobody really responds to those messages. I don't, even if I'm friends with the person.
24788 7
This is truly an FML!
realworldready 0
This is both a FYL and a YDI. Sucks you've got no friends, but conversing with yourself on fb is just sad man.
Holybatman 16
#117, The reason everyone comments on the word "proceeded" is not that it's grammatically incorrect or too high-brow, it's just that way too many new FML's are using the word when it's completely uncalled for. I didn't mind it at first either, but now it's starting to bug me. And OP, that's sad but not unexpected
Ohxcrap 0
500 is such a big number. You don't have to pretend you have friends only to be accepted. That's completely pathetic, and it's one big reason of why Facebook sucks. YDI.
domii_fml 0
hahha aw thats funneh.
britches 0
wow. can you say pathetic? I can!
fcuk_fml 0
oh my god. this is sad.
ohhhhno 0
I was not entertained by this entry. At all.
whudafxup 0
That is pathetic. Get a life that doesn't revolve around Facebook?