Today, my boyfriend decided he was going to narrate everything I do. I can't get him to stop. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my boyfriend he is good at singing. Now he won't stop. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend about what happened to me during the day when he stopped me mid-sentence, asked me to skip the middle and to go right to the end of the story, because he could feel himself slowly dying of boredom. Rude much? FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
Today, my boyfriend admitted to subtly encouraging me to do stupid things because he finds my "bimbo moments" hilarious. FML
Today, my live-in boyfriend spent yet another evening trying to bait Twitch streamers into a debate about stuff he barely understands. He's obsessed with "growing his audience", and I'm getting tired of his bullshit. FML
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me from the other room for washing the dishes "too loudly". FML
Today, my boyfriend was having a really bad day, so I decided to call him and try to calm him down. At one point, I thought it would be sweet to sing him a song since he claimed to love my voice. Before I could get half way through, he told me to shut up because I was getting on his nerves and just making things worse. FML
Today, I had a serious talk with my boyfriend about our relationship troubles. He stopped me in the middle of a sentence with a huge fart. FML
Today, my boyfriend said to me, in front of his friends, “Can you stop breaking out into song all the time? It’s getting really annoying.” FML
Today, I discovered that my boyfriend has a YouTube channel devoted to taking the camera out whenever he has to fart. FML
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Top comments
Redoxx_fml 22
"And then she typed angrily on her computer all the while telling me to stop narrating"
AllSoul 23
Peter Griffin?
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Comments (101)
akallaan 7
"My narration seems to be pissing my gir...." (punched in face) Girlfriend: "Narrate that bitch!"
coolboy675 16
I believe he's already narrating that bitch
The_Troller 14
This world would be a crazy place if you needed to add something with the purpose of a comma when you said something out loud. Just think about all of the misunderstandings.
Awwdatsucks 2
15- I wish grammar nazis were more like you.
akallaan 7
Damn commas..... "Let's eat Grandma." "Let's eat, Grandma."
nerobluerose 10
15 - where the hell are Brian and Stewie?
moneybagz131 6
She goes for the sofa aaaaand boom goes the dynamite! She scores! What's this? She reaches for the remote, will she turn turn the television on? *throws remote at head*
FightMyLiger 19
She was so mad, she typed up and submitted her story to FML.com...
loserman67 36
"My girlfriend is now polishing the dining room table after giving it a through dusting." "She has now turned and is telling me to shut the **** up." "She has turned back to the table and picked up the, no, wait a minute, she has suddenly turned back to face me, her right leg is swinging in a rapid motion towards my....................." "AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH, MY BALLS." That should shut his ass up for awhile.
DocBastard 40
What he can't see, he can't narrate. "She just threw all my shit on the front lawn. She's turning around and going inside. She's...um, she's back inside now." *silence*
ImInYourFACEbook 8
That makes me wonder what he does when she's asleep. "She is sleeping...still sleeping...Oh wait! Is that a snore I hear?! My god she just won't stop!"
Honestly_Lainey 21
Have fun doing reeeally girly things that he doesn't like. Watch click flicks. Read fashion magazines with headphones in your ears. Go shopping. Paint your toenails. Play with makeup. He'll get bored and stop... Or there's the possibility that he may join you, should that happen, you'll end up writing an FML for a different reason...
KK3137 31
"She is breaking up with me because I am annoying the crap out of her.. Wait, what??"
khaya 9
She then walked over and got the gun in the safe next to our bed...
perdix 31
I can get him to stop. Concrete shoes, cyanide, TNT, Neckties, contracts . . . high voltage! My fees are reasonable . . . one might say dirt cheap.
ssnowywinter 0
Officially my favorite Perdix comment. Winning reference.
ciaobella89_fml 0
AC/DC is awesome
Idonebeenhad 17
Perdix is awesome
danightryder 0
My gf would be laughing to hard to be mad at me for doing that