Today, I exchanged pictures with a guy I met online, whose devotion to his family really impressed me. In his picture, he was wearing clown makeup, holding a huge knife to his throat with one hand, and an ICP album in the other. All this with a psychopathic grin on his face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, when I turned on the TV, there was a picture of a wanted murderer. The picture looked just like my boyfriend. FML
Today, I went to meet the girl I'd been talking to online for a while, and fallen in love with. When I arrived at her house, my brother answered the door and took a picture of my shocked face. He and his girlfriend had planned the entire thing because I'm apparently the most gullible member of the family. FML
Today, the cute guy I met on Halloween finally decided to meet up with me after almost 10 months of phone calls, IM, and emails. He was noticeably disappointed and said I looked different. On Halloween I had full face zombie makeup. FML
Today, I walked in on my brother performing voodoo on a doll with my picture taped to its face. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me home for the first time. His place was covered in Insane Clown Posse stuff, even the toilet bowl. He's an undercover Juggalo. FML
Today, I finally met the guy I've been getting to know online in person for a date. When we saw each other, we both realized that we had heavily Facetuned our profile pictures. The awkward silence that followed was the longest five minutes of my life. FML
Today, I went on a date with a really cute guy. Things were going great, so we went to his place. While he was in the bathroom, I absentmindedly looked around his apartment. Unfortunately, his living room cupboard was half open, and I saw a shrine of pictures of me. Apparently, he's been stalking me for months. FML
Today, my deranged coworker sent me a text message containing a picture that she just took of her uncle. It was at his funeral. FML
Today, I finally exchanged pictures with the woman I've been seeing online for some time now. She replied, saying "Thats not funny. Some people actually look like that." I sent my real picture, and thought I actually looked pretty good in it. FML
Today, my 8-year-old son eagerly showed me a PowerPoint he made. It consisted of REALLY graphic and gory descriptions of a guy getting murdered, complete with pictures from the internet. He was laughing the whole time he was showing me this, and even set one of the images as his desktop background. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Unfortunately, his "family" is all the other idiot juggalos. Just be glad you've never met him in person, block his email address, and move the hell on.
the_smart_way 10
Why don't I read fmls properly... Sorry people, I will accept my failure and leave now :(
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Comments (194)
uglycrow 5
Sounds like my cousin..
femaleweezy_fml 3
whoop whoop.. no? okay.. nevermind.
LissaMccracken 23
No.
PrettyKookieToo 8
Marry him.
nevereyes 31
Grab that hunk of a man before he gets away!
yumyumyummy 0
You've found a winner there, though I doubt mist of these FML's even happen
MakeTodayADTR 20
You should have sent him a picture of Mr. Bed head. That guy is a beast, delivering mail and shit. Yeah.
j_cat187 20
******* clowns.
BloodRedViola 12
juggalos aren't that bad. I have about 5 friends who are and they are super nice and will stand up for friends and family. but yeah there are some crazy ones
inventindascene 5
Lmao
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
I'd assume by family, he meant his little Juggalo posse. You can't really judge someone based on their music taste, but Juggalos have been known to do some outlandish stuff.