Today, my boyfriend came over for dinner for the first time. As a joke, my dad answered the door wearing the white church robes that he wears when he is lay-reading during a church service, and said, "Welcome, child of God." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had my boyfriend come over for dinner for the first time. It was all going well until my dad started explaining to my boyfriend how to use toilet paper. He even demonstrated it. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time to meet my parents. The first words out of my dad's mouth were, "Son, I want you to suck upon my nipples of knowledge." FML
Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend over to meet the family. After several long moments of silence, one of my sisters burst out laughing, and asked, "Okay, who is this guy really?" FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML
Today, I invited my boyfriend to come to an event to meet some of my friends for the first time. I had been raving about him for weeks, and everyone was curious to meet this "amazing guy" I'd been dating. He showed up in a Darth Vader costume because he thought it would be funny to embarrass me. FML
Today, I had dinner for the first time with my boyfriend's parents. It was awkward enough without his mom asking, "So, what do you do for fun, besides my son?" FML
Today, my boyfriend met my dad for the first time. The first thing he said to him was, "You're an idiot for dating my daughter." FML
Today, I met my boyfriend's family for the first time. We got on the subject of theatre, and his dad brought up "The Book of Mormon", how finally someone was making fun of those "nasty, polygamist, cultist freaks", and if his son ever dated one, he would disown him. I'm Mormon. FML
Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML
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Top comments
Sinshine 28
Your dad sounds awesome. I'm sure you prefer him joking around with your new boyfriend to threatening him to not touch his baby girl and throwing him out.
bl3ur0z3 17
That's hilarious. Pray for that stick to come out of your ass so you can enjoy jokes.
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Comments (6)
Sinshine 28
Your dad sounds awesome. I'm sure you prefer him joking around with your new boyfriend to threatening him to not touch his baby girl and throwing him out.
TxKitten79 10
Oh my God (pun intended). That's friggin hysterical!!! It sounds like something my father would do!
Gubbon 17
There really should be a button "That's not bad at all". It's so dearly needed in many FML's.
bl3ur0z3 17
That's hilarious. Pray for that stick to come out of your ass so you can enjoy jokes.
jbuckets_404 39
Well, he's not wrong, is he?
Wadlaen 24
😂😇😂😇😂😇😂😇😂😇😂😇😂😇😂